What zodiac sign is the dumbest, stupidest, smartest, wisest according to astrologers? The most intelligent signs of the zodiac.

Each person is unique and individual in their own way. Someone sings and dances well, and someone is well versed in technology and electronics. All these qualities directly depend on the Zodiac constellation under which this or that person was born. Today we will try to determine which of the entire zodiac constellation is the most intelligent zodiac sign.

Many factors influence the character of a person, his abilities and destiny. And not last place takes the date of birth of a person, which predetermines his whole life.

planets solar system, patronizing the types of the Zodiac, have a certain influence on various areas.

Each zodiac sign has its own ruling planet. And the description of this planet helps to bring out the smartest, most talented, most sexy, handsome type. In this article we will talk about which is the smartest zodiac sign.

Each sign of the Zodiac has certain abilities and characteristics. Many types of the zodiac circle are directly opposite personalities, which is quite logical. Some types are characterized by unearthly beauty, others by a sharp mind, and others by luck in everything. One thing is obvious - a lot depends on the date of birth.

All signs of the Zodiac are influenced by the planets and constellations under which they were born.

It is believed that among all the planets, Uranus and Mercury are those that endow the type of the Zodiac with intelligence and quick wits.

Mercury is responsible for the intellect, governing the mind, thinking and education of a person.

Signs born under the auspices of this planet are distinguished by erudition, logic, excellent memory and ingenuity. So the most intelligent sign of the Zodiac is under the auspices of these planets.

Twins

Gemini is the children of Mercury. Almost from the first years of life, the Gemini surprise everyone around with their incredible quick wit.

Among the women and men of Gemini, almost everyone is considered very talented and savvy.

They can on long time get carried away with something interesting, achieving excellent results in this. Gemini is characterized by practicality in the area that they have chosen for themselves. Highlights their intelligence and sharp mind, although this is not always good, because to find worthy friends, a life partner and the right company happens to be extremely difficult. Geminis do not like to communicate with uneducated people.

Aquarius

The planet Uranus rules Aquarius. Aquarius, like Gemini, if not the smartest, then one might say, one of the smartest types of the Zodiac.

Among Aquarius there are a lot of inventors and artists who are world famous.

If you were wondering what is the sign of progress? The answer is unequivocal - Aquarius. They do not look for standard ways, solving any problems in an original and unusual way. If they are interested in something, they will work on it until they achieve certain results.

What astrologers say about other zodiac signs

Aries

Aries are smart and quick-witted people who know how to create the impression they need among those around them.

Among them there are also brilliant personalities, but quite rarely. As for the average Aries, he is perfectly able to use any, even seemingly unnecessary knowledge in practice, benefiting from it.

Taurus

At the first contact, Taurus does not always seem smart and quick-witted, more often creating the impression of a slow-witted and foolish person, but this is erroneous.

With close communication, this zodiac sign can turn out to be a real erudite, and his habit of thinking and weighing everything will become a virtue. Of the negative features of men and women of Taurus - the inability to use their knowledge in practice.

Cancer

Cancer is erudite and intellectual person, which often hides it.

With close contact, Cancer can open up and actually surprise the interlocutor with their thoughts. In addition, it is very useful to turn to such people for advice, since wisdom and life experience will allow Cancer to give optimal advice.

a lion

Leo is an intellectual for show. It often turns out that this zodiac sign knows much less than it wants to show to others.

All knowledge can be narrowly focused and very superficial, but this does not mean that they are stupid. It’s just that the “king of beasts” should not show their ignorance in anything.

Virgo

Virgo is a real student who loves to gain new knowledge and develop.

Among women and men of this type There are those of the zodiac who study all their lives and do not know how to put into practice the knowledge gained, and those who learn everything with extraordinary speed.

scales

Libras are smart and humble. Due to some modesty, Libra can be underestimated by society.

However, this sign of the Zodiac is not particularly worried about this, knowing perfectly well its capabilities and potentials. Among them are often creative personalities.

Scorpion

Scorpio is a sign that likes to test all their knowledge in practice.

Often they do not have a rich store of theoretical knowledge, but the fact that they strive for practice makes them quick-witted and with developed intuition. After all, it is not for nothing that practice is considered the best teacher.

Sagittarius

Sagittarius is a rather smart sign, since both men and women of this type can be safely called well-read and quick-witted.

They have an excellent memory and intuition, which very often helps them in life. Surprisingly, many brilliant ideas for Sagittarians do not come from the knowledge or experience gained, but from nowhere, which makes them also lucky in life.

Capricorn

Capricorn is considered to be a very intelligent type of the zodiac circle.

He loves to learn and gain new knowledge, which he then uses with pleasure in practice. In addition, Capricorns are reasonable and consistent, and this makes them not just smart, but also logical. Very few people can question the mind and intellect of Capricorns.

Fishes

Pisces in life are very fond of exaggerating everything. Speaking about the intellectual abilities of this type of zodiacal circle, it is necessary to note their richly developed imagination, which often helps them in life.

As for intellectual successes, they are often random and very unpredictable. However, this does not make this sign stupid at all.

The most intelligent sign of the zodiac - to summarize

Having studied the horoscope, we can say with confidence that there are no stupid people in the zodiac circle. Each representative has its own advantages and disadvantages.

In addition, often intellectual abilities depend not only on which planet patronizes a person, but also on what year he was born, what period of the day / night, and so on.

If you wondered which is the smartest zodiac sign in the zodiac circle among men and women, then it is impossible to answer it unambiguously.

All people are different. Although, according to scientists, among Gemini and Aquarius, the most intelligent and talented personalities are more common than others.

The stars endow us not only with certain character traits, but also predict the probable degree of intelligence development. Some zodiac signs are highly intelligent, while others are more stupid.

The title & the most stupid sign of the zodiac "does not mean that a person is necessarily stupid, just in different situations he may show a slow reaction, think too long, or his thoughts are more primitive than the rest of the zodiac.

Which one is the dumbest and dumbest?

Astrologers believe that Capricorn and Taurus, as well as Pisces and Cancers, have the hardest time in intellectual activity.

But this must also be considered from the point of belonging to the male or female half of humanity.

The Capricorn man prefers to solve issues not with the mind, but with force. Instead of acting on a person with words, he gets into a fight because he is better at it. At the same time, Capricorn is not averse to thinking, but his thoughts are primitive and more related to simple everyday problems than spiritual matters.

According to astrologers, Taurus are slow-witted, they solve the tasks assigned to them very slowly and do not always do it successfully. The Taurus man will be more successful as a performer, worker than a scientist or businessman. It is especially difficult when they have to solve something new.

Among the female stupid signs, Pisces stands out especially. They are immensely confident in their rightness, but their mind does not go beyond the solution of everyday and primitive tasks. They don't aspire to spiritual development, do not like intellectual conversations, simply because it is difficult for them to understand what they are talking about. But how to cook soup or lure a man - they don’t mind talking about it.

Cancers have a peculiar mind. They have a lot of theoretical knowledge, but it is difficult to apply it in practice.

Capricorn women too often show stupidity due to their stubbornness and propensity to sort things out.

The most wise and intelligent

Among the signs, of course, there are the most intelligent ones. Usually they belong to the elements of Air and Fire. Air is associated with spirituality, development, intellectual abilities and creativity. Fire is the power of energy, creativity, development.

Wisdom is associated with life experience and the ability to get out of difficult situations with honor and minimal losses.

He undoubtedly is a smart and intellectually developed sign among men. Few people know as much, combining knowledge with practical experience, as Aquarius does. His mind is mobile and innovative. Aquarius is an explorer, he is looking for new ways. However, not all signs can understand him, because Aquarius always goes ahead of progress and it may seem strange to other people, because it is quite difficult to keep up with his intellect.

The ability to know everything determines that Aquarius just gets bored, because he can answer almost all questions of the universe. Nevertheless, he cannot be called completely wise, because his emotionality and breadth of interests do not insure him from mistakes. This sign openly says what he thinks about people, and this sometimes brings him certain problems.

Smart signs include Gemini. But their mind is closer to cunning, although they have plenty of life wisdom. Gemini have inquisitiveness and curiosity, in childhood they love experiments, sometimes very dangerous.

Mercury rules Virgo. A man under this sign often chooses intellectual professions, for example, a teacher. He has a well-developed analytics and attention to detail, which makes him a neat and reliable worker.. For them, research work is suitable. They find themselves in medicine.

Among men, the most intelligent sign is Aquarius, but at the same time the most controversial and incomprehensible to other people.

Also included in the top of the most intelligent and practical. They perfectly control the situation, are good in social contacts. Sagittarians can be harsh and able to tell the truth in person, but at the same time they substantiate their thoughts well. Their mind is mobile, curious and aimed at obtaining new knowledge and practical experience.

Libra has a high intelligence among women. These are creative and developed natures who love to learn. They have a lot of theoretical knowledge, but at the same time Libra can not always put them into practice. This sign makes good writers, musicians, lawyers and teachers.

but Libras need to restrain their emotionality, which can sometimes interfere with the use of the mind.. The sign itself is very patient, it shows wisdom from childhood. The Libra woman critically assesses the situation, sees the pitfalls and consequences of actions. She has the ability to evaluate other people, so they make good psychologists. But the picture can be spoiled by the indecision of this sign in relation to their actions and the application of knowledge.

The Gemini woman also has a mind. Her natural curiosity and ability to memorize allows her to act effectively. and solve current problems.

Aquarius women are smart unless they get possessed by an overvalued idea or addiction, otherwise they simply stop developing.

Among women, Libra and Sagittarius are in the lead.

Certainly, it is impossible to say that only these signs are the most stupid or the smartest. Everything depends not only on the stars, but also on genetics, social factors and the desire of the person himself to develop.

IMHO ... I judge only from my environment, I do not want to offend anyone. The smartest - Pisces, all studied well, work for leadership positions. My mother is Pisces, 20 years ago she opened a real estate company, there are a lot of envious and dirty tricks among her competitors, but she miraculously bypasses all this and comes out the winner, an amazing sense of humor, a lot of friends. My sister is a cousin of a fish, she teaches at the university, my boss Valery Ivanovich is Ryba, at work everyone respects him. At school, Karina Stepanina, also a Fish, graduated with honors. The most stupid Capricorns, they are also loners and some kind of evil. I myself am a Virgo, they call me a queen))) - I can’t stand cheap clothes, perfumes and jewelry, and everything else, I love only the best and most expensive.

Are you sure that the level of intelligence and erudition depend on the books you read and the degree of training? But this opinion is completely refuted by astrologers, who claim that the constellations under which he was born influence the mind of a person. Each zodiac sign has its own level of intelligence. So what is the smartest zodiac sign according to astrologers? Let's find out about each!

Representatives of this sign can hardly be called geniuses, but quick wits and dexterity more than replace this quality. They easily achieve success, using their, sometimes not the most extensive, knowledge in practice.


The first impression of Taurus is often not the most favorable. Sometimes you might think that this is the dumbest sign of the Zodiac, most likely this opinion is due to the stubbornness of this sign. But upon close acquaintance, it becomes clear that the representatives of this constellation are erudite and very smart. But, alas, they do not know how to use their knowledge in life.


Gemini can safely be called the most well-read. Sometimes they shock the public with their knowledge in various fields. However, when it comes to everyday affairs, Gemini can get confused, as they are completely divorced from life's realities.


Representatives of this sign are distinguished by erudition, although it is quite difficult to detect this because of the secrecy of Cancers. But, if you dare to ask them for advice, expect the smartest and wisest advice in your life.


If Leo is asked which zodiac sign is the most intelligent, he, of course, will name himself. Lions love to flaunt their mental abilities, but most often their knowledge is not very deep. Although, according to astrologers, you will never be able to convince Leo and make him doubt his intelligence.


Representatives of this sign love to receive new knowledge. That is why their intelligence increases with age. Although there are individuals who remain eternal students until old age, never having learned to apply knowledge in practice.


This sign is famous for its smartest personalities, but society often does not notice this. The trouble with Libra is that in most cases only applied knowledge lends itself to them.


Most smart signs The zodiac definitely cannot do without Scorpios. The smartest, well-read representatives of this constellation use all the knowledge gained in life. The theory, confirmed in practice, is assimilated forever, which is why Scorpios become smarter with age.


Smart, erudite Sagittarians are distinguished by their tenacious memory and ingenuity. The most interesting thing is that knowledge in the head of Sagittarius can appear as if from nowhere, sometimes they themselves do not know where they know so much useful information from.


This sign can be safely called the most reasonable and consistent. According to astrologers, Capricorns strive all their lives to gain new knowledge, and they try to test it in life. This is what gives reason to believe that this is the most intelligent sign of the Zodiac, although there are other signs that can compete with Capricorns in terms of intelligence.


Many astrologers consider Aquarian intelligence to be the hope of the future. After all, how often the representatives of this constellation remain misunderstood, due to the fact that their thoughts often seem to be ahead of time.


Representatives of this sign are often in captivity of their own fantasies. Astrologers believe that intelligence in Pisces is rare, and even then, by pure chance. Pisces are not capable of accumulating knowledge over the course of their lives because of their “isolation” from the earth.


The stars endow us not only with certain character traits, but also predict the probable degree of intelligence development. Some zodiac signs are highly intelligent, while others are more stupid.

The title "the most stupid sign of the zodiac" does not mean that a person is necessarily stupid, just in different situations he can show a slow reaction, think too long or his thoughts are more primitive than the rest of the zodiac.

Which one is the dumbest and dumbest?

Astrologers believe that Capricorn and Taurus, as well as Pisces and Cancers, have the hardest time in intellectual activity.
But this must also be considered from the point of belonging to the male or female half of humanity.

Men

CAPRICORN

The Capricorn man prefers to resolve issues not with the mind, but with force. Instead of acting on a person with words, he gets into a fight because he is better at it. At the same time, Capricorn is not averse to thinking, but his thoughts are primitive and more related to simple everyday problems than spiritual matters.

TAURUS

According to astrologers Taurus are slow-witted, they are very slow to solve the tasks assigned to them and do not always do it successfully. The Taurus man will be more successful as a performer, worker than a scientist or businessman. It is especially difficult when they have to solve something new.

Women

FISHES

Among the female stupid signs, Pisces stands out especially. They are immensely confident in their rightness, but their mind does not go beyond the solution of everyday and primitive tasks. They do not strive for spiritual development, they do not like intellectual conversations, simply because it is difficult for them to understand what they are talking about. But how to cook soup or lure a man - they don’t mind talking about it.

CANCER

Cancers have a peculiar mind. They have a lot of theoretical knowledge, but it is difficult to apply it in practice.

CAPRICORN

Capricorn women also often show stupidity because of their stubbornness and tendency to sort things out.

The most wise and intelligent

Among the signs, of course, there are the most intelligent ones. Usually they belong to the elements of Air and Fire. Air is associated with spirituality, development, intellectual abilities and creativity. Fire is the power of energy, creativity, development.
Wisdom is associated with life experience and the ability to get out of difficult situations with honor and minimal losses.

Men

AQUARIUS

He is undoubtedly a smart and intellectually developed sign among men. Few people know as much, combining knowledge with practical experience, as Aquarius does. His mind is mobile and innovative. Aquarius is an explorer, he is looking for new ways. However, not all signs can understand him, because Aquarius always goes ahead of progress and it may seem strange to other people, because it is quite difficult to keep up with his intellect.

The ability to know everything determines that Aquarius just gets bored, because he can answer almost all questions of the universe. Nevertheless, he cannot be called completely wise, because his emotionality and breadth of interests do not insure him from mistakes. This sign openly says what he thinks about people, and this sometimes brings him certain problems.

TWINS

Smart signs include Gemini. But their mind is closer to cunning, although they have plenty of life wisdom. Gemini have inquisitiveness and curiosity, in childhood they love experiments, sometimes very dangerous.

VIRGO

Mercury rules Virgo. A man under this sign often chooses intellectual professions, for example, a teacher. He has a well-developed analytics and attention to detail, which makes him a neat and reliable worker. For them, research work is suitable. They find themselves in medicine.

Among men, the most intelligent sign is Aquarius, but at the same time the most controversial and incomprehensible to other people.

Women

SAGITTARIUS

Also included in the top of the most intelligent and practical. They perfectly control the situation, are good in social contacts. Sagittarians can be harsh and able to tell the truth in person, but at the same time they substantiate their thoughts well. Their mind is mobile, curious and aimed at obtaining new knowledge and practical experience.

SCALES

Libra has a high intelligence among women. These are creative and developed natures who love to learn. They have a lot of theoretical knowledge, but at the same time, Libra cannot always put it into practice. This sign makes good writers, musicians, lawyers and teachers.

However, Libra needs to restrain his emotionality, which can sometimes interfere with the use of the mind. The sign itself is very patient, it shows wisdom from childhood. The Libra woman critically assesses the situation, sees the pitfalls and consequences of actions. She has the ability to evaluate other people, so they make good psychologists. But the picture can be spoiled by the indecision of this sign in relation to their actions and the application of knowledge.

TWINS

The Gemini woman also has a mind. Her natural curiosity and ability to memorize allow her to act effectively and solve current problems.

AQUARIUS

Aquarius women are smart, unless they get possessed by an over-valued idea or addiction, otherwise they simply stop developing.

Among women, Libra and Sagittarius are in the lead.

Certainly, it is impossible to say that only these signs are the most stupid or the smartest. Everything depends not only on the stars, but also on genetics, social factors and the desire of the person himself to develop.

Every medal has two sides. Each of us has a shadow where those sides of character are hidden, which are clearly not worth boasting about. Let's talk about them. In our "anti-horoscope" our dark sides are deliberately given in a concentrated, convex form. Of course, such terrible people in their pure form do not exist - and the Capricorn cracker is compassionate, and the ever-doubting Libra can act decisively, and the cowardly Pisces are able to slap the presumptuous bully. But, hand on heart, we admit to ourselves, albeit not out loud: in the well-groomed flowerbed of our soul, we still come across different kind weeds. What exactly? Let's see.

ARIES

Aries March 21 - April 20 Nervous and impulsive Bastard. Perhaps that says it all. Immediately after the deed, either he asks for forgiveness - noisily, with ashes sprinkled on his head and other theatrical effects (so that the next day he will again take up the old), or he does not ask - you see, pride does not allow.

Excuses: "I'm sorry, I found something", "The demon beguiled".

To say that Aries is inherently an inveterate egoist is to say nothing. This child of militant Mars considers himself the center of the universe, and everything else and everyone else is just scenery and extras.

He does not think about words, despises etiquette, is straightforward to the point of being dumbfounded. Men shake hands in such a way that sometimes the victims have to apply plaster.

Aries have a very bad sense of humor. In fact, it does not exist, and what is there is an ugly attempt to attract attention to itself. If Aries are trying to joke, then it is better for the ladies to leave the room, and not every man will like to listen to obscene jokes of the lowest kind. At the same time, Aries is the first to laugh at his “jokes” and expect admiration from others.

Their interests for Aries always come first. You will not expect tact, tolerance from him. But if Aries is offended, then the whole world should suffer with him. He won't let go of your vest until he's completely covered in tears. And your attempt to escape will be regarded as a betrayal. Aries are obsessed with their own problems and there is nothing they like to talk about more than how much they underestimate them.

Aries has so much optimism that from the outside he may seem like a fool. He lives in the moment, the mistakes of the past do not teach him anything. So Aries is able to step on the same rake many times in his life, getting the same bumps.

Ruthless in any competition, in the struggle for fame, money and love. Without hesitation, he will work with his elbows, breaking out into the lead.

An irresponsible type, but not out of malice. It’s just that if Aries’ attention is diverted to something new and unusual, he can leave the post without a single convulsion or disrupt an important meeting.

Despite his fearlessness, he himself cannot stand even the slightest pain - a slight scratch fills his eyes with tears of compassion for himself. And surgeons or dentists for Aries are completely insensitive bone breakers.

He does not consider a single ailment worthy of lying in bed. Therefore, it often triggers the disease to the ambulance and strict bed rest.

Aries is quick-witted, but in moments of anger it is able to crush not only furniture or the ribs of a person who has turned up under hot hand person, but also his feelings.

You can’t call him a windbag, but he is capable of chatting all night long on topics about which he has the most vague idea, or arguing furiously contrary to obvious facts and ordinary logic.

Winning the location of Aries is very easy, it can be anyone you meet. It is enough to say a couple of simple compliments - and Aries will forget about the family. Now he will rush about with his new "friend", devoting all his time to him and emptying the family wallet for him.

TAURUS

Taurus 21.04 - 21.05 Calculating Bastard. You don’t even have to ask this: “Do you even know what you are doing?” Believe me, he still thinks. He certainly calculated in advance where to hit, so that it would be more painful.

Excuses: "You deserve it yourself".

Taurus rarely have large dimensions, but to move them from their place, from earlier occupied positions almost impossible. This is not stubbornness or laziness, but such a philosophy of life: why are you all fussing when everything is stable and clear? Therefore, Taurus is an incredible retrograde, the guardians of antiquity and the stranglers of everything new.

Taurus is terrible in anger, although not everyone can unbalance him.

A homebody to the marrow of his bones, pulling him to a party, concert or walk is not a trivial task. A sedentary lifestyle undermines the health of Taurus. Diseases are of a protracted nature, because the doctor is not an authority for him, he does not believe in the prescriptions and does not follow them. In general, Taurus has few authorities, but the boss for him is an unconditional authority. Anyone who is higher on the social ladder seems to Taurus to be a unique, special person.

The main feature of this sign is stubbornness. But he considers himself rational and reasonable person. In love, he is infinitely devoted, but the flip side of the coin is the inability to get a divorce and leave if the love of the second half has irrevocably ended. Taurus is capable long years to force, gundet and prove that you can’t find anyone better than him anyway.

Taurus is leisurely in everything - in thoughts, actions and feelings. Therefore, a representative of any other sign may fall into despair from close communication with Taurus. And to knock out a declaration of love from him is a real feat. This ponderous person, be it a man or a woman, prefers to be whipped after him, and not vice versa.

Big food lover.

His humor is rude and simple-hearted, he prefers a strong word or a salty joke. In a company, he can laugh loudly and for a long time at a bearded anecdote that he himself told, causing awkwardness and bewilderment of other people.

In a strange way, greed and love for luxurious personal things can coexist in Taurus. Taurus most often buys such things for himself, for his beloved, and not for those who are nearby.

TWINS

Gemini May 22 - June 21 Frivolous Bastard. Often, he simply does not understand that he is behaving like the last bastard (one and a half meanders somehow do not have to analyze their actions). He forgets about the dirty trick done after 5 minutes.

Excuses: “Are you offended? Why?"

In fairness, this sign should be called the Monkey - so its representatives are restless and fussy. Endless flickering, instant mood swings and a stream of thoughts can cause migraines in everyone who comes into contact with Gemini. Tendency to be late, including even own wedding, - them business card. Just on the way, any little thing can distract them so that they forget about everything in the world.

Dexterous debaters who are able to quietly change their point of view to the opposite during the discussion, and after five minutes - return to their original positions. To convey some information to the Gemini, you need to work hard, because these fidgets are good at listening only to themselves. And talkativeness is the root of their nature. It seems that even in a dream they do not stop and tell something to someone all the time.

These Gemini are slippery people, they are able to get out of any situation. They are completely incapable of admitting their mistakes. And if they manage to pin them to the wall with irrefutable facts, when it is no longer possible to evade, they fall silent in a pose of offended innocence. Subsequently, they can take small but painful revenge.

Rumors and gossip are their element. Any rumor they immediately pass on, extraordinarily embellished. The thought that they are hurting other people by spreading fables does not occur to them.

They have a "short breath", that is, no work, idea or feeling can attract Gemini for a long enough time. Their passion is constant change, even if it comes at the expense of other people or the Twins themselves.

Their extravagance is well known - they are ready to sell in a minute what was earned for months, or even years. And on occasion, brag that they spent twice as much as they actually did.

Gemini cannot be relied upon for anything really important. With a sense of responsibility, they have a clear tension.

They can talk on the phone, cook, iron a shirt and watch TV at the same time. As a result, the food burns, the shirt too, everything ends with a scandal with a telephone interlocutor.

Born magicians, merchants, card cheats and pickpockets. Thieves by nature; for them, stealing is fun, entertainment. In the store they can, without wanting it (and often wanting it), deceive the seller. Their innate charm in this case confuses others and makes it possible to slip away without hindrance.

CANCER

Cancer 06/22 - 07/22 All-Of-Themselves-Unfortunate Bastard. It's you - the bastard, and he - an innocent victim of circumstances. And it will always be so, even if there are ten times more nasty things on his account than on yours. Moreover, he will make sure that the whole world knows how you treated him, poor thing, badly.

Excuses: “You yourself forced me!»

The cunning of this zodiac sign is unsurpassed. Cancer can fool anyone. Crayfish humor is multi-layered, and applied to the enemy is an almost lethal weapon. Sincerely laughing at funny story, told by Cancer, the listener may soon realize that, together with the whole company, he was laughing, in fact, at himself. That is, Cancer subtly exposed him to the general ridicule.

If you offend a representative of this sign and he becomes discouraged, he will literally infect with depression everyone who is within a radius of several kilometers. The vindictiveness and vindictiveness of Cancers never manifests itself openly, but he knows how to secretly take revenge on the offender very cruelly. Woe to those who encroach on the property of Cancer, whether it be a loved thing or a person.

Offended Cancer can be silent for weeks. This drives his entourage into mortal despondency. Constant changes of mood cause no less suffering to loved ones, ranging from mortal anguish to unrestrained, like a baby, optimism with blowing happy bubbles.

Frequent bouts of unprovoked anger.

Cancer's greed for junk is colossal. Big money can be spent on some ancient trifle. And with difficulty they part with things that not only went out of fashion in the century before last, but also worn to holes.

Extreme egoists in love. Their feelings, emotions and experiences are the main thing in life. Feelings of other people can be neglected.

The thriftiness of Cancer comes not from greed, but from the eternal expectation of trouble and the coming "black days". A real warehouse of canned goods, cereals and pasta in his house is a common thing. Often tin cans are swollen, and cereals and pasta are green from time to time.

The passionate love of Cancer can play a bad joke on his children. Totally patronized, Cancer babies can grow up to be complete opportunists, selfish and loafers. After all, mom or dad until death will wipe the snot, poke money and feed in a way that is not fed in every palace.

The tendency to eat tight and tasty comes back to Cancer with a quick and irreversible weight gain, digestive problems. Vegetable salad, sorrel soup? Dismiss! Big and fat chop fluffy pancakes floating in oil and condensed milk - this is a meal worthy of Cancer.

Even if someone is drowning, Cancer will wait until the drowning person swallows water thoroughly before rushing to save him. And Cancer will do this only when he is convinced that there really is no one else on the shore besides him.

A LION

Leo 23.07 - 23.08 Selfish Bastard. He is wise and great, he is a king, others are rubbish underfoot. From this position all his foul language follows.

Excuses: "I wanted to."

To have fun for Leo means to live. In pursuit of sensual pleasure and being the center of attention, he will go to any expense. The famous ancient Greek politician Alcibiades cut off a piece of his dog's tail for several days. "Why torture the poor animal like that?" the fellow Athenians asked him. “Because all Athens is only talking about me!” Alcibiades answered. Typical behavior for a representative of this sign: glory - at any cost!

In politics, the Lions are strong like, perhaps, no one else. But their love of flattery gives clever people a great opportunity to solve their problems and enrich themselves illegally, licking the master from head to toe, often acting against his own interests.

A hypertrophied sense of self-importance, selfishness and pride can make Leo an intolerable companion, a terrible friend or lover. But do not dare to poke him into these shortcomings, which just seem to him to be virtues. Otherwise, the purring kitten will instantly turn into a real angry lion and use its powerful fangs and claws.

Being a boss is a natural state for a representative of this sign. He is a great organizer and leader. But if things are going well, and the subordinates are trained and there is nothing to complain about, the boss Leo can beat his own secretary to death for mere trifles. He perceives failure to fulfill even a small order as a personal insult, the punishment for which will be quick and disproportionately harsh, up to and including dismissal.

There are many military leaders and generals among the Lions. Crushed by the lion's authority, the subordinates are afraid of them like fire, behind the eyes and rightly call them "durogons". Such people sincerely believe that if they do not follow their subordinates, they will do everything in the world awry. Therefore, their constant guardianship and control can bring anyone to white heat. In addition, Leo has the ability to imperceptibly shift any non-prestigious, obviously failed work onto the shoulders of those around him, and to take on those cases that will certainly bring money, fame and honor.

Having a rather modest intellect, Lions exalt their mental abilities to the skies, love to “build” everyone, utter instructive monologues, unceremoniously poke their lower noses into their mistakes, true and imaginary. Even if there is not the slightest reason to speak, Leo will still make a speech, albeit about nothing, just to remain in the spotlight. And this confident speech will be heard by everyone in the district. And if there is a party in Leo's house, at least the entire adjacent quarter will know about it.

As you understand, all these qualities can only be characteristic of a person devoid of self-irony, and a sense of humor in general.

VIRGO

Virgo 24.08 - 23.09 Resentful Bastard. Somewhere, once you crossed her path (or simply spoke unsuccessfully about her) - get what you deserve! All these years she just waited opportunity to pour out all the dirt that has accumulated inside her.

Excuses: out of business - “Me?! Yes, how could you think! or triumphant "But remember ..."

Bores and clean, bringing the rest to a frenzy with their passion to put everything on the shelves. Remember: if you took something from the Virgin and forgot to put it back, she is already suspicious of you. And an unclosed tube of toothpaste or sausage skins, forgotten on the table, means for her that you are a goner and the prison is crying for you.

Cleanliness for many Virgos becomes a real mania. A barely noticeable speck on a child’s clothes or shoes not cleaned to a mirror shine by her husband can ruin her mood for a long time or provoke a stormy scandal.

And it would be fine if her pedantry concerned only clothes and cleanliness in the house. But after all, she judges human relations in exactly the same way. Any deviation from the norm (which she herself established and only she knows) leads her to despair, and sometimes to rage. In your relationship, she put everything on the shelves a long time ago, and just try to rearrange at least a couple of things on these “shelves”.

Impenetrable conservatism and restraint are inherent in their thoughts and movements. Any intrusion from the outside causes an inadequate response in terms of the degree of resistance. She always knows everything better than anyone and makes it clear that she does not need advice. That's why Virgo almost always has bad (in best case cool) relations with neighbors.

Virgos are cowardly. Forgivable for women, but for a Virgo man this is not the most suitable quality. And they are also extremely arrogant. It is difficult to have more ambition than Leos, but some Virgos succeed. Plus, they love money. Not just love - worship! Large sums have a magical effect on Virgo.

Virgo's thoughts are most often occupied not with what she does in this moment. That is why the results of its activities look strange: it glitters from one side, and from the other ... And we will turn the other side to the wall, and no one will see.

In the upbringing of children adheres to strict rules. He considers it important that the child be neatly dressed and fed according to the season. It is not necessary to play, take a walk or at least talk with him. There are other, more pressing matters. It is equally difficult to achieve affection, spiritual understanding and response from the Virgin. Instead of regretting, she will give a lecture in which she scrupulously and ruthlessly analyzes all the mistakes of the complainant and sums up: "He is to blame for everything."

Dev's erudition is well known. They will insert a quote in any situation and for any reason, without thinking about its appropriateness and the fact that words that are true, but said in a soulless and moralizing tone, can hurt another person.

SCALES

Libra 09/24 - 10/23 Cowardly Bastard. Libra rightfully won 1st place in the rating of bastards. Vile, immoral being. Here he lied, here he slandered, there he betrayed - such is the way of life. And all because of cowardice.
Excuses: none. Nashkali and hid.

It's hard to rely on them. Libras are not sure of themselves, they sort out behavior options to the point of clouding in their brains even in situations where there is nothing to think about - no matter what you do, everything will be fine.

In Libra women, something masculine always slips, in men - on the contrary. This does not mean that the ladies of this sign are all shot throwers. But their behavior can often be unnecessarily harsh. And effeminate men with the habits of affectionate scoundrels or with the unbearable sweetness of gays are definitely Libra. And even under the brutal appearance of some Libra men, a cowardly sheep's soul is hidden.

Capriciousness is also a clear characteristic of this sign. Hidden nervousness latently infects the people around them, they often become uncomfortable in the company of Libra. Periods of active and even violent activity are replaced by melancholy and lethargy. During these periods, Libra is prone to quarrels, painful tearfulness. By nature, very courtesy, diplomacy and courtesy, they, being in a bad mood, get rude so cool that even Scorpio will shut up.

Overeating and addiction to alcohol often seriously damage their health. Moreover, Libra prefers gourmet food and expensive wines or cognacs, for which they are ready to spend any money.

Love for them is a field of endless adventures. The most notorious ladies' man is, of course, Libra. Moreover, having been carried away by another representative of the opposite sex, they, without hesitation and remorse, leave their beloved or leave the family. Marriage, they subconsciously consider the shackles in which society shackles them, so tender and fragile.

They like to talk endlessly in the genre of "on the one hand, of course ... but on the other hand ...". It is simply impossible to move Libra to a quick decision, even when the situation requires it. Because of this habit of constantly weighing and evaluating everything, they often lose out to more straight-minded people who are ready to take risks.

Children for Libra - best material for experiments. If the first child is allowed everything, up to physical sitting on the head of the parent, then the other, for some unknown reason, will be brought up with a tight rein.

SCORPION

Scorpio 24.10 - 22.11 Principal Bastard. Principles can be anything, they are not the essence. From the point of view of his supercomplex worldview, you have violated some kind of prohibition and should be punished. He considers himself an instrument of Justice (with a capital letter, yes).

Excuses: none. And an upturned chin.

Their independence and propensity for forceful actions are known to many in their own skin. Going at least in some way the way of Scorpio means almost certainly signing a death sentence for yourself. This is a merciless opponent, whose outburst of anger is akin to an atomic explosion, sweeping away everything in its path. He is vindictive, vindictive and never forgives insults. Just try to encroach on something that belongs to Scorpio - you will regret that you were born into the world.
If, by chance, there is no suitable object for attack in the vicinity, Scorpio begins to saw, gnaw and devour himself - for past mistakes and failures that everyone has long forgotten about. Or, if the enemy is clearly stronger and Scorpio fails to bring him under control, he pours out his bile and hatred on everyone indiscriminately.

Natural hypnotism often pushes Scorpio to bad deeds. Having charmed the victim, he will clean his pockets with a wry smile, force him to act of his own free will, or put him on the shoulder blades in any dispute. The only way to dodge it magical influence- bypass or wear dark glasses, because Scorpio hypnotizes only with a glance.

In life, with rare exceptions, he is surrounded by "pathetic, insignificant personalities" - a purely scorpion expression. So why bother with them? Let them listen and obey.

His passions are indomitable, although his face most often remains impassive. Those who betray his love will not do well. To punish enemies or traitors, he can resort to the services of black magicians. However, he has no outside help it turns out to strongly conjure against anyone. And irreconcilable religious fanatics are also most often Scorpios.

He does not know how to smile and does not like, the smile of Scorpio is a rare event. This is the only sign that will not leave anyone indifferent - Scorpions are either passionately revered or hated to the core. There is no third.

Uncontrolled courage and neglect of danger often leads to injury. In this sense, Scorpio is the champion of the zodiac.

Love for him is not only a natural outlet for raging passions, but also an arena of eternal battle. Moreover, he fights to the blood not only with competitors, but also with a loved one, completely subordinating him to his will and whims.

One of the most unpleasant things associated with him is that one of the close relatives necessarily dies a year before or within a year after the birth of Scorpio.

SAGITTARIUS

Sagittarius 23.11 - 21.12 Scandalous Bastard. A tram cad, a bazaar woman… Enjoys conflicts as such.

Excuses: meaningless text, abundantly flavored with obscenities, in a raised voice.

Cheerful loafer, optimist and reveler. The smile does not leave his face, and his humor knows no bounds, including the limits of decency. In the company, he can easily give an unfamiliar lady an unpleasant compliment like “and you are well preserved for your age!”. At the same time, each Sagittarius considers himself an outstanding diplomat.

His talkativeness is comparable to the talkativeness of Gemini. His friendliness is like an ocean in which, against their will, everyone around them drowns. Very quickly, friendship turns into familiarity and endless drinking until the money runs out. Friendship with a Sagittarius can lead you to sink lower and lower until you find yourself under a fence at night, without a wallet, without a coat, in a state of the deepest hangover. Remember: Sagittarians drink a lot, you can't keep up with them.

Sagittarius' generosity and willingness to help everyone in the world can put his own family on the brink of starvation. Among other things, he does not know and does not understand what sadness, emotional experiences, and even more so deep depression are. For him, the world is full of all sorts of temptations and interests, so there is no need to be sad and there is no time. It is almost impossible to find understanding and compassion in Sagittarius in a difficult situation.

In love, he is reckless, fickle. One marriage will never be limited. But after parting with ex-wife or husband, Sagittarius seeks to maintain friendly relations and acts in this sense with a captivating, albeit inappropriate pressure and obsession. Love generally plays too small a role in his life, it is too serious a thing for Sagittarius to be carried away by it. And they seem to never experience passion at all. Here friendship is much more interesting for them.

A child of Jupiter, Sagittarius hardly obeys his superiors, considering himself a more competent and advanced specialist. But, having become the boss, he can overwhelm any business, treating his subordinates too paternally and forgiving them even critical mistakes. This is a person who thinks and analyzes only after he has already done something. But, despite the recklessness of nature, Sagittarius can dashingly shave off the one who really hurts him with a caustic word.

CAPRICORN

Capricorn 22.12 - 20.01 Stubborn and limited Bastard. The indifference of Taurus + the egoism of Leo + his personal unique stupidity. More greed as a condiment.

Excuses: "So it happened."

Its main feature is stinginess. With money, feelings, love and compassion. The most callous bureaucrat and literalist is precisely he, Capricorn. His whole life seems to be scheduled by the minute, in his head there are solid diagrams, tables and numerous manuals for all occasions. Probably, many of Capricorns even dream of them at night, and they moan in a sweet buzz.

Capricorn is absolutely intolerant of defeats, he cannot stand them. The patronage of Saturn gives Capricorn toughness and perseverance in achieving its goals - even if this requires going over the heads, and even over the corpses of enemies. Although he himself is not a fierce fighter, he eliminates any obstacles with an unwavering hand.

Capricorn's love is a real punishment for the object of love. It's a tough feeling! Even looking into the eyes of Capricorn in love, I want to stretch out into the front, click my heels and blurt out: “What do you want, your honor?” Even if he cares about your feelings, he will never show it. And, of course, marriage of convenience is an invention exclusively of Capricorn. He does not consider it necessary to waste energy, time and emotions on all sorts of sentiments.

In general, Capricorns are fatally uninventive. They can be smart, and very smart, but only with other people's thoughts. By the way, Capricorns are talented, but rarely can realize their talent, because they themselves do not allow themselves to go beyond the generally accepted.

Pedantry in the upbringing of children can make these children neurasthenics who always feel guilty for any misdeeds, including imperfect ones. And even if everything is done perfectly, neither dad nor mom of this zodiac sign will pat on the cheek, but will limit themselves to a dry nod. Like, okay, it will come down and so, it could be much worse.

God forbid, if the affairs of Capricorn stall for a long time or go wrong. He will turn into a bore before our eyes, which the world has never seen. Will nag and criticize everyone and for anything. By old age, a rare Capricorn does not turn into a hopeless grouch.

The secret dream of any of them is absolute power from behind the scenes. Capricorn is not attracted by the light of spotlights, the worship of the broad masses of the people and world fame. His ideal is Professor Moriarty, sitting in the quiet of his office, but holding in his hands all the threads of the underworld of London.

Almost any treasure found was once hidden by Capricorn. He can save money all his life, but he himself will not use them in the end and, such a miser, will not tell his relatives about them.

AQUARIUS

Aquarius 21.01 - 18.02 Cynical Bastard. Honorary 2nd place after Libra. He will do nasty things just to laugh at your suffering. He has a congenital heart disease - that is, his (heart) absence.

Excuses: "Ha ha."

External extravagance, multiplied by a penchant for shocking antics. Revolutionary, threatening shocks to everything - from the family way of life to the world order. Promiscuity in means, dating and love. All this can be found in abundance in Aquarius. True, having reached middle age, often it is he who becomes an inveterate conservative, a persecutor and strangler of freedom (alien).

Aquarius is not too interested in what kind of building will be erected on the ruins of a broken world. The main thing is to dismantle the old and hardened, regardless of the blood and suffering of other people. In fairness, it should be said that Aquarius does not spare himself in the fight.

This is the worst of all possible companions of life. His rebellious heart will never belong to one single person. His love is fleeting, fragile and superficial. Parting with former loved ones is always the same as throwing worn gloves into the trash - that is, without regret and in an instant. Although all people are brothers to him, including his wife, it is impossible to put him in any framework. Therefore, by the way, Aquarius does not like marriage so much - one of the types of the most rigid framework.

But from the child of Aquarius, anything can grow - from a brilliant scientist to a talented swindler. Because his children are left to their own devices and can even walk on their ears - the parent will not even blink an eye.

Terribly cynical and wanted to spit on the norms of decency. It picks up the keys to any human soul very well, but, as a rule, with bad goals. To get to the bottom of the matter, he can behave unceremoniously and arrogantly, asking direct questions on the forehead on the most intimate aspects of life. An Aquarius man, when meeting a lady, can stupidly and straightforwardly ask, for example, whether she has an orgasm or is frigid, like a statue. And in response to a burning slap in the face, she will openly burst into laughter in her face, crimson with anger.

Aquarius is strong in the sciences, this zodiac sign gives the most scientific talents and geniuses. At the same time, Aquarius absolutely does not see the prospects of what he is working on. Electric chair? Napalm? New model machine gun? He is not at all concerned that all this will eventually become a murder weapon - only the creative process is important. However, the myth of the genius of Aquarius is debunked by life itself. Most of them, if brilliant, are in areas that we do not know about. By the way, among the inhabitants of psychiatric hospitals, most of all Aquarius.

Just try not to keep this word - the son of Uranus will immediately delete you from his life. He also has excellent intuition, but he can use it to achieve his goal at any cost, even causing direct harm to a trusted person.

FISHES

Pisces 19.02 - 20.03 Indifferent Bastard. Hearing the cry of “Help!”, He slams the window and wraps himself more tightly in a blanket. Don't expect him to come to your hospital where you live. last days on injections.

Excuses: "Every man for himself, I'm sorry."

General softness and indistinctness, lack of initiative, often outright cowardice. Unwillingness to apply adequate forces to achieve one's own benefit. The tendency to deceive, even if there is no apparent reason for this. This is the reverse side of the medal with the Pisces sign.

Their spinelessness, willingness to go with the flow is amazing. From this naturally follows the rare talent of an opportunist and a sycophant. Narrow-minded bosses value Pisces precisely for this. But you can’t rely on them even in the most trifling matter - most likely, they will let you down, squander, forget, or do it at random. They see the world through rose-colored glasses - perhaps Pisces came up with this term.

Most often, they are impossible to get through. In response to any shocks or terrible messages, you will see the same infantile serenity. The feeling that Pisces is always stoned - either they pulled vodka, or they smoked a joint. By the way, they internally understand their inability to live in our harsh world and leave it for the world of illusions. Among alcoholics and drug addicts, Pisces is the most.

In Pisces men, the biggest disaster is their talkativeness. They are capable of carrying nonsense for hours, so that then you want to chat your head to shake out all the garbage from it.

While watching a cool action movie, at the most intriguing and energetic moment, they are able to turn off and sail away somewhere into the foggy distances for their own poorly formed thoughts. If this happens when working with complex equipment or while driving, an accident cannot be avoided.

They love to draw, but they don't know how. Rather, this is how their creations confuse others. A classic example is Kazimir Malevich with his "Black Square", a natural Fish. In general, in art, they go their own way. Maybe we have not yet matured to understand such creativity, but every time you see something viscous, absurd or frankly abstract in any field of art, you almost physically feel that you are being led by the nose.

Their only effective weapon against the rough world and unceremonious people is a sense of humor. You shouldn't really hurt Pisces if you don't want to get a portion of sarcasm, before which even the evil tongue of Scorpio can give in. Pisces are able to finish the offender with a few caustic phrases so that the unfortunate person will have to heal bruises and abrasions for a long time.

Did you recognize yourself or someone you know in these stellar bastards? I hope we didn't slander anyone. Let your friends treat such things as star predictions with humor - show them the horoscope of the bastard signs of the zodiac.

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