Some vocabulary for storytelling in English.

Hello everyone! Have you ever tried to tell a story in English? I bet yes! When you are just talking to your friend for example, of course you want to tell him about what happened to you and what is new in your life. It's quite natural and we do it every time we talk to people.

In this article, I would like to tell you a little story, just to invent something for you. And then together we will look at some interesting points and phrases that I will use.

History in English.

So here's the story:

« Other day I went to the cinema. I had plenty of time till the next train home. So I made up my mind to watch that new movie by Quentin Tarantino which was called "Django Unchained". To be honest, I'm not a big fan of westerns, but I'm crazy about all the Tarantino's movies! So I just couldn't miss it! What's more, I had so much free time that I could watch even two movies!

When I came to the cinema it turned out they didn't have the tickets for "Django Unchained". I was really upset. But it was not a surprise, because the cinema was so crowed and it was the premiere, so all the tickets had been bought away very quickly. So the only thing I could do was just to seat and wait for my train. I went to the nearest fast food and had a bite there.

For some reason I decided to come back to the cinema and ask them one more time about tickets for "Django Unchained". Believe it or not, but they said that they really had the last ticket! The point was somebody had just returned his ticket, because he couldn't watch the movie in that time. I was so glad! So that day I managed to watch "Django Unchained"! The movie was great, I liked that! After it finished I came back to the Railway Station and went home!

I was lucky that day for sure!»

“The other day I went to the cinema. I had plenty of time until the next train home. So I decided to watch a new movie from Quentin Tarantino called Django Unchained. To be honest, I'm not a big fan of westerns, but I'm crazy about Tarantino movies! So I just couldn't miss it! Moreover, I had so much time that I could even watch two films.

When I got to the cinema, they didn't have tickets for Django Unchained. I was really upset. But this was not surprising, because the cinema was filled with people, and it was a premiere, so all the tickets were sold out very quickly. So the only thing I could do was just sit and wait for my train. I went to the nearest fast food place and had a bite to eat.

For some reason, I decided to go back to the cinema and ask them again about the tickets. Believe it or not, they actually had one ticket! The thing is, someone just got their ticket back because they couldn't go to that show! I was very glad! So I was able to watch Django Unchained that day! The movie is great, I love it! After it ended, I returned to the station and went home!

Undoubtedly, I was lucky that day!”

Spoken phrases from the text.

Despite the fact that the meaning of the highlighted phrases is already clear from the translation, I will still give a few more examples with them below:

First phrase - "other day". It means "most recently, one or two days ago, the other day." For example:

Other day I passed the exam.

(I passed my exam the other day)

Other day I went to the bank.

(Recently I went to the bank)

"Plenty of time". It means "to have a lot of time". And not just time. For example:

I had plenty of time to do that.

(I had plenty of time)

I had plenty of opportunity.

(I had a lot of opportunities)

I have plenty of books.

(I have a lot of books)

"I made up my mind". It means "I have decided".

to make up smb mind - decide, make a decision.

I made up my mind to go to University.

(I made a decision to go to university)

I made up my mind to stay home.

(I chose to stay at home)

« To be honest. The phrase means "To tell the truth, to be honest." For example:

To be honest, I don't like you.

(Honestly, I don't like you)

To be honest, I don't know where to go.

(Honestly, I don't know where to go)

« I'm crazy about."

"To be crazy about something" means to be crazy about something, to really adore.

I'm crazy about English.

(I'm crazy about English)

« What's more. The phrase means "moreover, there is more":

What's more, I like swimming!

(Moreover, I love to swim!)

What's more, he is our friend!

(Moreover, he is our friend!)

"I t turned out". Cool phrase, means "It turned out ...":

It turned out, we are lazy.

(It turned out that we are lazy)

It turned out, he was wrong.

(Turned out he was wrong)

« had a bite".

"To have a bite" means "to have a bite." Simple and good phrase:

Yesterday I had a bite at the cafe.

(Yesterday I had a snack in a cafe)

Let's have a bite!

(Let's have a bite!)

« For some reason". It means "for some reason, for some reason". For example:

For some reason, I've done it.

(For some reason, I did)

For some reason, I didn't ask him about it.

(For some reason, I didn't ask him about it)

For some reason, I don't like this song.

(I don't like this song for some reason)

« Believe it or not" believe it or not.

Believe it or not, but I know what I saw!

(Believe it or not, I know what I saw!)" The point is…” — the point is that…

The point is I like you!

(The thing is, I like you!)

The point is you should learn English hard!

(The fact is that you should study English hard)

"I managed to...". Cool phrase, means "I succeeded, I succeeded":

I managed to visit that museum.

(I managed to visit that museum)

I managed to buy the best seats.

(I managed to buy the best seats)

"For sure"- no doubt:

I like this game for sure.

(Undoubtedly, I like this game)

For sure I'll be there.

(I will definitely be there)

That's it, friends. I hope you will use these phrases in your own and develop your English.

Keep going and take care of yourself!

» How to tell a story?

Doctor: Could you pay for an operation if I thought that it was necessary?

Patient: Would you think the operation was necessary if I couldn't pay for it?

Teacher: Tom, your homework, in which you wrote about a cat, is very much like your brother's story. How is that?

Tom: Nothing strange about that, we have only one cat at home.

Little Girl: Mother, my cat can talk.

Little Girl: I ask her what is two minus two and she says nothing.

Mother: What are you jumping up and down for, Paul?

Paul: I took my medicine and forgot to shake the bottle.

Hello! Is that Ted Wells?

Yes. Who is speaking?

Who? I don't hear.

I say Sam: Sid, Ada, Mary. Do you hear?

Yes, I do. But which of you three is speaking now?

Mother: You are seven today. Happy birthday to you Tommy.

Tommy: Thank you Mummy.

Mother: Do you like to have a cake with seven candles on it for your birthday par-ty?

Tommy: I think I better have seven cakes and one candle, Mummy.

Tourist: Excuse me, but does this bus stop at Tenth Street?

Passengers: Yes. Watch me and get one station before I do.

Tourist: Thank you.

Are you still looking for your dog, Bill?

Why don't you put an advertisement in the paper?

What "s the use! The dog can" t read.

The waitress brought the soup to everyone in the dining-room of a small hotel. Mr. Smith got the last plate and the waitress stayed for a moment beside his table; she was looking out of the window.

“It looks like rain,” she said.

“Yes,” said Mr. Smith (he had tasted the soup), “and it tastes like rain too.”

Mr. Gray was on holiday by the sea. He was staying in a small hotel but it was not a good hotel. The meals were very small. One day he sat down to dinner. His plate looked wet. He held it up to the waiter and said, “This plate is wet. Please bring me another.” “That's your soup, sir,” replied the waiter.

At last the visitor had to say something about food.

“I don't like this pie, Mrs. Fiddles,” he said. “Oh, don't you?” said the angry landlady. “I was making pies before you were born.” “Perhaps this is one of them.”

“I"m doing very well in my driving lessons," Betty said. "Yesterday I went 50 miles per hour. Tomorrow I"m going to try to open my eyes when I pass another car.”

The policeman stopped a woman driver for going too fast.

“When I saw you coming round that corner, I said to myself, “At least 45” the officer told her.

“Well,” was the answer. “I always look older in this hat.”

“Why were you driving too fast, madam?” the policeman asked.

“My breaks aren't very good”, she answered, “and I was hurrying home before I had an accident

A gentleman was sitting quietly in a first-class compartment. Two ladies got in. One of them saw that the window was open, and she shut it

before sitting down.

“Open it again,” said the second lady. “I"ll die of suffocation if there is no fresh air.”

“I won't open it,” said the first lady. “I'll die of cold if the window is open.”

A quarrel started, and it continued until the gentleman-spoke:

“Let"s have the window shut until this lady has died of suffocation, and then we can have it open until this lady has died of cold. After that it will be nice and quiet in here again.”

The young doctor had just finished his training. He didn't know what the patient's illness was.

“Have you had this before?” he asked.

“Yes, doctor.”

“Oh! Well! You"ve got it again."

John Smith couldn't sleep, so his doctor gave him some sleeping pills. He took a pill that night.

He felt well when he woke up, and he went to work cheerfully.

“I slept very well last night,” he told his boss.

“That's good,” his boss said. “But where were you yesterday?”

“My boyfriend is wonderful,” said Helen. “He is rather nice, I must say,” said Kate. “He tells everyone that he is going to marry the most beautiful girl in the world,” said Helen.

“I am so sorry,” said Kate. “Perhaps he will change his mind and marry you after all.”

When a girl shows a ring and says that she is going to be married, it is usual to ask: “Who"s the lucky man?" It "s a silly question because everybody knows that the lucky man is her father.

“I love you so much! Do you think you could live on my salary?”

“Of course I could. But what would you live on?”

Mr. Brown finished breakfast. Then he asked the waiter to bring the manager of the hotel.

"Yes, sir, what can I do for you?" said the manager when he arrived.

"You must have a very clean kitchen here," said Mr. brown.

"That is very kind of you to say so, sir," said the manager. "But what makes you think we have a very clean kitchen?"

"Well," replied Mr. Brown, "everything tastes of soap."

"What"s the meaning of this fly in my

"I don't know, sir. I "m a waiter, not a fortune teller."

A man was just finishing his lunch in a restaurant. The waitress asked if he would like coffee.

"Yes, please," he replied.

The waitress went away but came back quickly and asked, "With cream or with-out, sir?"

"Without cream," he replied.

Then, after a much longer wait, the waitress returned. "I'm very sorry," she said. "There is no more cream. Will you have it without milk?"

Little Tommy liked to ask questions. One day he asked his father one more question. His father did not know the answer. "Don"t ask me so many ques-tions," he said. "You have already asked me nearly a hundred questions today. I didn't ask my father half as many quests.

"Well, Daddy, perhaps you would know more of the answers to my questions if you had asked more," said Tommy.

Mr. and Mrs. White had a very good table in their dining room. It was made of the best wood. When Mr. and Mrs. Brown visited the Whites, little Tommy White was hammering nail after nail into the costly table.

"Isn't that a rather expensive game?" Mr. Brown asked.

"Oh, no," Mr. White replied. "I get the nails at the shop on the corner. They are really quite cheap."

Billy didn't ask for a cake. He reached past the lady visitor and took one.

"Billy!" said his mother sharply. Haven't you got a tongue?

"Yes, Mum," Billy replied. "But it won't reach as far as the cakes."

How Many Were There?

The police in a big city were looking for a robber. One day they caught him and took him to prison. But while they were taking photo-graphs of him - from the front, from the left, from the right, with a hat, without a hat - he suddenly attacked the policeman and ran away.

Then a week later the telephone rang in the police-station, and somebody said, “You’re looking-ing for Bill Cross, aren’t you?”

“Well, he left here for Waterbridge an hour ago.”

Waterbridge was a small town 100 miles from the city. The city police immediately sent four different photographs of the robber to the police in Waterbridge. Less than twelve hours later they got a telephone call from the police in Waterbridge. “We have caught three of the men,” they said happily, “and we hope to catch the fourth this evening.”

The Sea on Strike

Many years ago, a London theater performed a play with a terrible storm at sea in one of the scenes. The waves were made by some boys who jumped up and down under a large piece of green cloth. Each boy received a shilling a night for his work.

The play was very popular and the hall was usually full. But the director of the theater wanted to make still more money from the performances, and he decided to lower the boys" pay from a shilling to sixpence. This made the boys angry, and they decided to go on strike for a shilling a night.

During the next performance, when the storm began, there was enough loud noise on the stage, but the sea was absolutely calm, not one wave could be seen. The theater director immediately ran behind the stage, raised a corner of the green cloth and shouted, “Waves! waves! Why aren't you making waves?!” One of the boys sitting under the cloth asked him, “Do you want sixpenny waves or shilling waves?”

“All right, all right!” the director said. “I"ll give you a shilling, only give me the waves!”

Tremendous waves immediately began to appear on the sea, and everybody agreed that they had never seen a better storm in the theatre.

An Anecdote About Mark Twain

One of Mark Twain's hobbies was fish-ing, and he used to go fishing even in the closed season when fishing was not al-lowed. Like many fishermen, he some-times invented stories about the number of fish he caught.

One day during the closed season, Mark Twain sat fishing under a little bridge. A man crossing the bridge saw him fishing there. The man stood watching Mark Twain fishing, and then he asked, “Have you caught many fish?”

“Not yet,” Mark Twain replied. “I"ve only just begun. But yesterday I caught thirty big fish here.”

“That's very interesting,” the man said. “Do you know who I am?”

“No,” Mark Twain said. “I don't think I ever saw you before.”

“I"m the fishing inspector for this dis-trict," the man said.

"And do you know who I am?" Mark Twain asked quickly.

“No, of course not,” said the inspector.

"I am the biggest liar on the Mississip-pi," Mark Twain told him.

tea leaves

There was a time when drinking tea was almost unknown in European countries; many people had never even heard of tea. This anecdote is about an old woman and her son, who lived at that time.

The woman's son was a sailor, and every time he returned from a far-away country, he brought his mother a gift. Naturally, he tried to bring something unusual that she could show to her friends.

Once, the young man came back from India with a box of tea for his mother. She didn't know anything about tea, but she liked the smell, and invited all her friends to come and taste it. When her son came into the room, he saw cakes and fruit and sweets on the table, and a big plate filled with tea-leaves. His mother and her friends were sitting round the table, eating the leaves with butter and salt. Though they all smiled, it was clear that they didn't enjoy eating the leaves.

“Where is tea, Mother?” the sailor asked.

His mother pointed to the plate in the middle of the table.

“No, no, that is only the leaves of the tea,” the sailor said. “Where is the water?”

“The water!” his mother said. “I threw the water away, of course! out of the set!” He smiled to himself, lit his pipe and began reading his favorite book

Short stories in English (short English stories) - adapted and in the original. For beginners, continuing and improving. For those who are just starting to learn English or those who do not want to forget it. The best stories by English and American writers with exciting plots are especially suitable for those who study English on their own.

If you have looked at this page, dear reader, then you want to read something in English. You can choose book, story or short work, and at the same time and watch his film adaptation. Let's take a journey through time together, say, to the 18th century, get acquainted with the era, its typical characters, and at the same time with the greatest writers who lived at that time. They speak to us through several centuries, putting words into the mouths of the heroes of their works. A good book is a relative term. After all, we have different tastes, so you will find different works on our site. However, one thing is certain - all the books that we offer are worthy of being read. After all, it's not just best books in english- This classics of English and American literature. So, open the book and go to another world. Don't get lost!

Chemist's Bad Day

Upon arriving home in eager anticipation of a leisurely evening, the husband was met at the door by his sobbing wife. Tearfully she explained, "It"s the druggist - he insulted me terribly this morning on the phone." Immediately the husband drove downtown to accost the druggist and demand an apology. Before he could say more than a word or two, the druggist told him, "Now, just a minute - listen to my side of it. This morning the alarm failed to go off, so I was late getting up. I went without breakfast and hurried out to the car, but I "ll be damned if I didn't lock the house with both house and car keys inside. I had to break a window to get my keys. Driving a little too fast, I got a speeding ticket. Then, about three blocks from the store I had a flat tire. When I finally got to the store there was a bunch of people waiting for me to open up. I got the store opened and started waiting on these people, and all the time the darn phone was ringing its head off. Then I had to break a roll of nickels against the cash register drawer to make change, and they spilled all over the floor. I got down on my hands and knees to pick up the nickels - the phone is still ringing - when I came up I cracked my head on the open cash drawer, which made me stagger back against a showcase with a bunch of perfume bottles on it , and half of them hit the floor and broke. The phone is still ringing with no let up, and I finally got back to answer it. It was your wife - she wanted to know how to use a rectal thermometer. Well, Mister, I TOLD HER!"

We at Lingvistov often say that our task is an interesting study of the English language. When you are captured by the process itself and you see its meaning, then English is no doubt learned quickly and painlessly. Therefore, we decided to diversify everyday life, filled with grammar and boring educational texts, and offer a selection of jokes in English! Funny stories in English will help you develop your language skills, improve your vocabulary and just improve your mood.

Woops Sorry About That

Marvin, was in the hospital on his death bed. The family called Marvin's Preacher to be with him in his final moments. As the Preacher stood by the bed, Marvin's condition seemed to decline, and Marvin motioned for someone to quickly pass him a pen and paper. The Preacher quickly got a pen and paper and lovingly handed it to Marvin. But before he had a chance to read the note, Marvin died. The Preacher feeling that now wasn't the right time to read it put the note in his jacket pocket. It was at the funeral while speaking that the Preacher suddenly remembered the note. Reaching deep into his pocket the Preacher said “and you know what, I suddenly remembered that right before Marvin died he handed me a note, and knowing Marvin I’m sure it was something inspiring that we can all gain from. With that introduction the Preacher ripped out the note and opened it. The note said “HEY, YOU ARE STANDING ON MY OXYGEN TUBE!”

TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell "crocodile?"

GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L"

TEACHER: No, that's wrong.

GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.

bad date joke

“Hi Sarah, listen I only have a minute. I’m about to get picked up for a blind date, can you call me in a half hour just in case it’s going bad? Yes? Ok great! We'll speak." Raquel gave herself a quick spray of perfume, checked herself out one more time in the mirror, and headed outside to wait for the guy. Sure enough after twenty minutes Raquel was discreetly checking her watch. After ten more long minutes her phone finally buzzed. Raquel listened for a few seconds, grimly pursed her lips, and turned to her date, “I feel terrible, but my Grandmother is terribly sick, and I must go home now .” “No problem!” Said her date with a big grin, “in a few more minutes my dog ​​was going to get run over!”

The child and his mother

A curious child asked his mother: “Mommy, why are some of your hairs turning grey?”

The mother tried to use this occasion to teach her child: “It is because of you, dear. Every bad action of yours will turn one of my hairs grey!”

The child replied innocently: “Now I know why grandmother has only gray hairs on her head.”

home work

PUPIL – “Would you punish me for something I didn’t do?”

TEACHER – “Of course not.”

PUPIL - “Good, because I haven't done my homework.”

* * *

TEACHER: Clyde, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?

CLYDE: No, sir. It's the same dog.

* * *

TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?

SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.

* * *

TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?

LOUIS: Because George still had the ax in his hand.

Mathematics, Physics, & Philosophy

Dean, to the physics department. "Why do I always have to give you guys so much money, for laboratories and expensive equipment and stuff. Why couldn't you be like the math department - all they need is money for pencils, paper and waste-paper baskets. Or even better, like the philosophy department. All they need are pencils and paper."

Mental Patient

John and David were both patients in a Mental Hospital. One day, while they were walking, they passed the hospital swimming pool and John suddenly dove into the deep end. He sank to the bottom and stayed there. David promptly jumped in and saved him, swimming to the bottom of the pool and pulling John out. The medical director came to know of David's heroic act. He immediately ordered that David be discharged from the hospital as he now considered him to be OK. The doctor said, "David, we have good news and bad news for you!" The good news is that we are going to discharge you because you have regained your sanity. Since you were able to jump in and save another patient, you must be mentally stable. The bad news is that the patient that you saved hung himself in the bathroom and died after all." David replied, "Doctor, John didn't hang himself. I hung him there to dry."

News stand

A newsboy was standing on the corner with a stack of papers, yelling, "Read all about it. Fifty people swindled! Fifty people swindled!" Curious, a man walked over, bought a paper, and checked the front page. What he saw was yesterday "s paper. The man said, "Hey, this is an old paper, where"s the story about the big swindle?" The newsboy ignored him and went on calling out, "Read all about it. Fifty-one people swindled!"

School Question

Mother: "Why are you home from school so early?"