Mercy for man. Mercy and compassion: what makes us more human? What is the difference between mercy and kindness

A policeman, a medical student from Malaysia, "Vladimir Lenin", a schoolgirl, writer, officer, retired Israeli engineer, historian of philosophy, head of the legal department from Chelyabinsk answer. A survey on the streets of Moscow showed that mercy is not enough for everyone, but people understand this word in different ways.

Pavel, 24 years old, policeman

What is mercy to you?
- It's kindness.

Is mercy needed in the modern world?
“Of course it is necessary, because the world has become cruel. People have become more selfish, this is manifested in the greed of each individual. Because each person wants to survive in this environment and does not want to help another. And everyone needs help.

– Even for those who are to blame for their misfortune, for example, alcoholics?
- If a person is incurable, then this does not mean that he cannot be helped.

Have you experienced compassion in your life?
- I am an orphan, and my relatives took me into the family and helped me quite a lot in terms of education, the formation of ideas, thoughts and dreams for the future. It meant a lot to me. If you lose both parents, then there is no particular desire to strive for something.

– Is there a place for mercy in your work?
- Here we caught some criminal who robbed a man. And how many people were hurt? Maybe he took the last one from someone? His capture is a mercy towards those who could become the next victim.

Tell me about a specific incident from your life.
There was a fight at the station. I was dressed out of uniform and walked around the station, I saw people I didn’t know fight, and I separated them.
How did you do it, it's not that easy, is it?
-Well, the turnip is not small.

Igor, 30 years old, head of the legal department of a company producing pumping equipment

– This compassion is not only for loved ones, but in general, for everyone around. Sympathy, expressed in a certain help to people in difficult moments for them.

- Necessarily. No mercy anywhere. If we do not have mercy in our hearts, then we have no right to consider ourselves human beings. Without mercy, indifference to common problems appears, a person begins to lock himself in on himself, on his own benefits, becomes indifferent. I don't think this should happen in our society.

– I personally and our company help an orphanage and a nursing home in the Chelyabinsk region. We organize children's holidays, recently built playgrounds, and collect the necessary things for the nursing home. There is a group of people who show indifference. This is not only personal faith, but also education.

Aravinden, medical student from Malaysia

What does mercy mean to you?
- Mercy is when one person helps another, this should happen everywhere. Mercy is needed to take a load off some people's shoulders.

Have you experienced compassion in your life?
- Last week I was on the subway, and one lady was traveling with a big bag and could not get down. She asked me for help and I helped her and then I moved on. And then there was another staircase, and I decided to wait for the woman and help her again, and she said "thank you very much."

– Is there more mercy in your country?
- Yes, sure. I have been living in Russia for three years. The life of people here and in Malaysia is very different. I do not see here people who help others. Meanwhile, this is a common thing in my country, I have seen it many times. Wherever you are, if something happens on your street, they come up to you and ask “how can they help you”. And here people just pass by and don't pay attention, they don't care.

"Vladimir Ilyich Lenin"

What does mercy mean to you?
- If you feel sorry for a person who harms himself, drives himself into a coffin, for example, drunkards, then this is not mercy. Probably, they should not be pitied, because they chose their own path. But if a person falls ill or otherwise gets into trouble for reasons beyond his control, then naturally mercy can be shown.

Have you experienced compassion in your life?
- In my life I try to rely more on my own strength and help myself more than they help me. Several times it happened that they helped me, but mostly they hindered me. Here, for example, our valiant organs have made criminals drag and drag to their department.

I gave my nephew an apartment. Daughter left another apartment. And when I leave, I will immediately make a large number of relatives happy, because it was not Lenina who earned four apartments in 20 years and I am collecting money for the fifth.

When I started, I hoped that I would have my own plane - it all started so briskly. But suddenly all this was gone, so I settled on the apartments.

They began to copy the image from me, but other “Lenins” somehow have no luck. I thought someone would surpass me, a normal, worthy Lenin would appear. When they came, it depended on me whether to leave them here or not - I had influence on the police. Out of my kindness, I decided okay, let them work. Moreover, he gave them things from his own shoulder, now a jacket, then a cap. But instead of going up, they all started to go down, became alcoholics. Money is easy, at hand, they earn it and immediately drink it away. It turned out that instead of good, I did them evil.

Evgenia, 16 years old, schoolgirl

What does mercy mean to you?
-Now there is so little mercy both here and everywhere. People help only if, for example, a child falls ill, and it is necessary to cure him, but even then very little. People become evil, there is less good, the world is degrading.

- Why do you think so?
“Because of the people, their actions. People both familiar to me and strangers on the Internet laugh at the sick, at the infirm. It's bad, and I think it's evil. Or they say one thing in person, but behind their back they can say something completely different, and in fact they turn out to be completely different, they hide their emotions and their character.

Have you experienced compassion in your life?
- I help sick children or I can give some money to passers-by on the street or put it in a collection box for some operation. I can help relatives, including mentally. For example, if they have a problem, then you can suggest a solution, and if a person feels bad, then help him with a kind word, somehow support. Maybe this is mercy?

Sergei Pavlovich, writer, former power engineer

What does mercy mean to you?
“Compassion is a complex concept. For some people, mercy is like, you know, entertainment. And real mercy is when you give your last and really want to help someone.

Have you experienced compassion in your life?
- I am a writer and I also worked on this topic. For all my life, and I had a big one, so there was no such thing as truly mercy. There was kindness, care, but there was no mercy. Mercy is something higher.

In my time, people somehow treated each other better. This is how they bring up today - you must win yourself, be an egoist and break through everything in this life. The basis of today's life is competition.

I read that Schwarzenegger killed 549 people in his films over the years of his acting career. Although he did not kill very much, but flaunted more. Movies like this evoke a little bit of violence. Especially a lot in children's games, they constantly kill and kill. For many now, killing a person is already so, nothing special.

I lived in Cuba for four years, it can be difficult to show mercy there, because everyone has the same level of income, but the people there were kinder.

N., aged 39, historian of philosophy and religion

What does mercy mean to you?
– Never thought about it. The Russian language is so rich. The compound word is a merciful heart.

Have you experienced compassion in your life?
- For me, yes. For me, much less so. For example, my mother fell very seriously ill, she was diagnosed with cancer, and I was actually left alone with this misfortune. I graduated from the institute, entered graduate school, and I had no money at all, and I had to pay for everything.

I immediately prepared for the fact that I would get into a terrible mess, almost to the point of selling the apartment. All the people I met, maybe, seeing my age, did not take a penny from me, all the doctors helped as best they could. And when it was necessary to pay a lot of money for chemotherapy, they made it so that we could get it for free.

I cured my mother. I was not required to sell the apartment, although I would have done it. For me it was a colossal act of mercy, absolutely not banal. Moreover, no one bred snot - a person has a job, and he did it. Very specific, very calm, they literally led me by the hand through the stages of treatment. And I came to my senses a little. As a result, doctors saved not one, but two lives.

“What, you didn’t help anyone at all?”
- Why no one? What am I, a total freak or something? I give money, just purposefully - not to beggars, but to specific people whom I know. Elderly, neighbors, relatives. I don't do anything. It is very simple to do some feasible specific things, without committing an “act of mercy”. I buy, for example, rather expensive medicines for a lonely person who cannot buy them.

Or my mother was in a ward with nine people. There are no nurses, no one. Come, help, clean up, right? Everything is covered in dust, if you remove this dust, people will breathe easier. That is, some elementary things. I don't think it's mercy. On the other hand, it became easier for people, they heard a kind word from me. Maybe the pain has lessened a bit.

Konstantin, 41, officer

What does mercy mean to you?
– As a citizen of Russia, I believe that mercy is selfless help.

Is mercy needed and why?
- It is necessary, because it is one of the foundations of society. If there is no mercy in society, then it will destroy itself. Warriors going to war must be sure that if they die, their families will be supported. And the soldiers who returned from the war must be sure that their state will also support them. So are social cataclysms, which are costly to many sections of society.

Have you experienced compassion in your life?
- Certainly. I served in Asia for a long time, I had to save people who got into difficult situations. We served there, the places are deserted, the villages are 150-200 kilometers away, and frosts in winter are 30-40 degrees.

The situations were different: the equipment breaks down, the local population, hunters, sometimes got stuck in the wilderness, we saved them. In the camps, Slavs, including Russians, still work as sakmans without documents. They flee from slavery, they are caught, this is no secret to anyone. We also rescued the fugitives.

Eitan Degani, retired from Israel, former engineer

What does mercy mean to you?
“It is the ability of one person to act with love towards another person or many people or animals. It is the ability to give to others. For me personally, charity is to act with a personal feeling towards others. I'm not sure if mercy equals compassion. Compassion is seeing another from a higher point of view, understanding what he wants, and helping him with it.

– Is mercy necessary in the modern world?
“I don't know if anyone understands the world, unless he looks at it from a religious point of view. The religious point of view gives the big picture with God and so on. The world needs mercy. The more the world tends to look at everything from the point of view of the economy, the less it notices people. He only thinks about development, how to make more money, and he doesn't care about people.

The same can be said about politicians and oligarchs. Have you heard about the 99%, that the elite make up less than 1% of the population, and they own all the wealth? This is unfair to other people. There are uprisings and riots all over the world. In Spain, Russia, in the USA on Wall Street. Of course, governments act without compassion. They operate in terms of how to manage people. And I would like politicians to look at people with more compassion, and not from this selfish point of view of "how to keep the government." And some religions need more compassion.

Have you experienced compassion in your life?
- Yes, yesterday we stopped a taxi ... I hope this will not go to the KGB? Not? Okay. We saw a woman with a sign and asked the taxi driver to stop. She looked poor, and the sign said she had two children. All three of us in the taxi gave her some money. It just happened automatically.

At all times, compassion and the desire to help the needy and the weak, the sick and the weak were considered one of the main virtues. However, now in real life, many of us are guided by a different principle: “The main thing is that I feel good!”. For some, mercy seems archaic, others consider it a good and noble phenomenon, and even admire merciful people, but they themselves are not ready to lift a finger to help the suffering. And after all, really - what's the point of violating one's own spiritual comfort, taking other people's troubles, sufferings and problems to heart? Why deny yourself the pleasures and expensive purchases, helping other people or saving someone's life? And, in the end, what benefit does a person get if he takes the path of mercy to the detriment of his desires and interests?

On the Benefits of Selfless Kindness

When Tanya K. entered the courses of sisters of mercy, her mother was shocked: “You're crazy, daughter! It’s not enough for you that the groom left you, that you are always unlucky in life - so you also found a profession worse than ever! Do you want to suffer for a penny where no one will work for normal money, you are ready for “God save you” ... but endure and bandage rotten wounds for those who are lying down?! Do you want to be an old maid?!” But Tanya did not listen to her.

The kind and sympathetic junior nurse very soon fell in love with all seriously ill patients. regional trauma hospital. In the wards where she worked, the mortality rate has noticeably decreased - after all, before many patients died only because there was no one to turn them over and treat bedsores in time, or to appease their deadly spiritual anguish with a kind word and prayer. Tanya began to be called "the good angel of the department." Previously considered an "ugly duckling", the girl found spiritual harmony and noticeably prettier. Walking at her wedding, I could only be glad for how well everything turned out for my friend. Having become a happy wife and mother, after maternity leave, she still works where she is so loved and always looked forward to ...

From an egoistic point of view, participation in someone else's pain, problems and hardships, to put it mildly, is not attractive and does not bode well. It is not clear how people can voluntarily and naturally hang on themselves other people's troubles and sufferings, refusing a calm, carefree life. But even an egoist, leaving prejudice and trying to help those in need, may be surprised to realize that in fact being kind and merciful is very pleasing to the soul and very useful, and not only in the moral and spiritual sense. Since the outside world is a direct extension of ourselves, by compassionate and helping others we benefit ourselves. As practice shows, those who try to selflessly help others and do good are usually lucky in life, they are accompanied by good luck and good mood.

Not so long ago, I had a chance to communicate with businessman V., whom friends and relatives sometimes reproach for “excessive extravagance”. He cannot pass by someone else's misfortune and helps a lot of people. Because of this, he has to deny himself any excesses - he does not have a cool villa somewhere in the resort, a yacht and other expensive toys, but he has enough of a Moscow apartment and a modest dacha near Moscow. But you rarely meet such a cheerful and cheerful person among such a circle of people, radiating goodness and love.

Somehow, his wife almost persuaded him to buy a prestigious expensive SUV instead of a modest foreign car that even a simple manager can afford, and he has already collected money for the purchase ... But at the last moment he accidentally found out that the little son of his ordinary employee was seriously ill, and if urgently not raise money for an expensive operation abroad - he will die. He gave her the money and the baby was saved. As A. admitted, having denied himself a purchase for the sake of saving someone else's child, he was rewarded with such joy and spiritual pleasure, which he, perhaps, had never had before. Yes, and the company's revenues after that increased markedly. Someday later he will buy himself a new car. Unless, of course, someone needs his help again ...

My friend, an ordinary guy Seryoga, loved to live "high" and never considered himself an altruist. Last year he was going to go on vacation to the south. He was already looking forward to how he would relax at sea, enjoying doing nothing and holiday romances. But due to abnormal heat and drought, forest fires began. Learning that the fire was approaching the village, where as a child he often rested with his grandmother in the summer, he unexpectedly handed over his tickets and, instead of the sea, went to save the forest as part of a voluntary fire brigade. His grandmother is no longer alive, and strangers live in her house, but Sergey could not rest calmly, knowing that his native village was in danger of death. The village was defended, and it was possible to leave, but he got so into the taste that he decided to stay and then helped put out fires in neighboring areas for another two weeks.

From a philistine point of view, Seryoga acted like a “loch” - he deprived himself of a serene rest and worked most of his vacation for free. But in reality, he received great moral satisfaction and felt that he did not live in vain in the world. And he also met a wonderful girl who, like him, could not remain indifferent when she learned about the burning forests and villages. They fell in love with each other and it looks like they are going to get married soon.

Medicine for the soul

A parishioner of the neighboring parish, Nikolai L., had a rich and successful cousin, Oleg, who was envied by many. He changed like the gloves of beautiful wives, expensive cars and did not deny himself anything. But when once Kolya offered him all possible help to their resurgent temple, he in response twisted a contemptuous face and twisted his finger at his temple: “Here’s another thing, I don’t have extra money for such garbage, everything is in business!” Another time, Kolya's daughter became seriously ill, and he asked his cousin just to lend him money for treatment. But even here the relative categorically refused him. The parishioners of their beloved temple came to the rescue, having collected “from the world bit by bit” for the treatment of the girl.

Kolya did not hold a grudge against the greedy cousin, he even sympathized with him - no matter how beautiful his life may be at a superficial glance, in reality, living such an unmerciful person is probably hard and joyless. The recent financial crisis crippled Oleg's business and led his firm to bankruptcy. I had to sell both dachas - in the Moscow region and on the Black Sea, and almost all the cars. Another wife fled to a more successful competitor, and Oleg started drinking in desperation. Recently, he mysteriously fell out of the balcony of the eleventh floor and crashed. Relatives believe that it was not an accident, but suicide.

Indeed, one can only sympathize with those for whom mercy seems to be something superfluous and unnecessary. While kind, sympathetic people are spiritually enriched, finding joy and peace in their souls, their merciless antipodes let cold, evil and despondency into their hearts. Such people, even living in luxurious palaces, are able to feel like they are in hell, unsuccessfully trying to drown out longing and inner emptiness with work or the search for pleasures.

But everyone has a chance to improve and start a new life, even the most hardened criminal.

Andrei G. spent almost half his life behind bars for murder, theft and robbery. In the zone, he was feared and respected for his strength and tough temper. Once, while sitting in a punishment cell, he fell ill and felt himself on the verge of life and death. He was seized by a black, impenetrable longing. Unexpectedly for himself, he clearly saw and felt how dirty his soul, which he himself disfigured, how vile and hopeless his life, which is about to end. He wept and whimpered in despair, and then something like a penitential catharsis happened to him. He clearly felt and saw God, and he was given to understand that the Lord loves even such a fallen one and is waiting for his repentance and correction. After that, the prisoner G. radically changed and, as most of his colleagues considered, “he went crazy and became blissful.” Andrei suddenly became quiet and meek, and he perceived the opening of a church in their “zone” as a precious gift from Above. After his release, he categorically broke with his old friends and, on the recommendation of the prison priest, got a job. Now he is a permanent parishioner of the church where one of my familiar priests serves. In his free time, G. regularly goes to the nursing home and the hospital, bringing food and sweets for abandoned old people and having heart-to-heart conversations with them. With good deeds and helping people, he tries to compensate for the evil that he had done before.

Before, one might say, I did not live, when I robbed people and deprived them of their lives - in fact, I killed myself from the inside! - he confessed to me during the conversation. - And now, when I help others, I “let go” little by little, the beginnings of the soul come to life, joy and satisfaction appear. And the hope that God will forgive me for everything ...

Don't do good - you won't get evil?

How unjust and abnormal this sinful world is! - one of my acquaintances once declared to me, a lively fifty-year-old woman who considers herself a model of kindness and mercy. - How hard it is to be kind and help everyone, because there are only ungrateful pigs around!

In recent years, Olga has been leading an active charitable life, hoping to earn a good place for herself in the Kingdom of Heaven. But the good she does is too saturated with vanity and complacency. There is no mutual understanding with his own son - "the dunce has grown up and does not want to do anything." As if to spite him, from time to time she brings “wanderers” and even outright homeless people into the house, fiddles with them, launders, feeds, even leaves them for the night despite the noisy protests of her son. And then he is indignant if, after their stay, money and some things are missing. Benefactored people use her goodness, but, as a rule, do not reciprocate. Even her own brother, whom she helped so much with money and saved from prison, did not even think to help when she herself needed emergency help. So help people!

The proverb “do not do good - you will not get evil” is inherently crafty, but it did not arise from scratch and in a number of situations it can turn out to be relevant. Not all merciful people are lucky in life, especially if they are not free from pride and expect kindness from others in return, and if they don’t wait, then they are offended. In addition, good should be done with intelligence and reason, otherwise it can sometimes turn into evil for those to whom this good is done and for the benefactor himself.

I know a kind, but painfully authoritarian father of the family, who is trying to decide everything for everyone, "so that everyone is fine." His wife secretly becomes an intoxicant, his beloved daughter fled to live with her lover, unable to bear the "too right" father, and his son tried to commit suicide after his father forbade him to enter the theater institute, which he had dreamed of since childhood. According to Victor, the boy should go to a "serious" university - to become a lawyer or an engineer, and not "hell knows where." Recently, he got the idea to help restore an Orthodox church. But there was not enough money from the income of his company, and then he began to delay and cut the salaries and bonuses of his employees. He was even issued a certificate of honor on behalf of the Church, which he hung in a conspicuous place in his office. But almost all of its employees quit, unable to endure and endure the "Orthodox" boss-tyrant.

When doing good, it is useful to analyze whether it will benefit everyone, and whether it will turn into evil. Good deeds should be done just like that, from a good heart, immediately forgetting about it, not flattering yourself with narcissism and not expecting bestowal and gratitude from anyone. And also not trying to "buy" yourself the forgiveness of sins. And it is better not to tell anyone about your kindness and mercy.

A role model could be considered who lived in XIX century in Moscow, Dr. Fyodor Gaaz, who during his lifetime was considered a saint by many. He was a very rich man, but he spent all his income helping the poor, sick and prisoners. He opened hospitals and schools, treated and provided medicine to the suffering for free. As a result, by the end of his life, he spent all his savings, and even had to bury him at public expense. But such an example of perfect mercy is far from being able to accommodate every person. In order not to condemn ourselves to failure and poverty, it is better to calculate your abilities and capabilities.

What a good Christian God!

In the first centuries of the spread of Christianity, many pagans respected Christians and were drawn to them precisely for sincere love and mercy. In the life of St. Pimen there is an interesting incident from his youth. He was a pagan and served in the imperial army. Usually, the population of cities and villages met the soldiers with hostility, not wanting to share food with them and endure the insatiable army horde at a quarter. But one day, after a long tiring campaign, exhausted troops entered an amazing village, the inhabitants of which did not hide, but themselves came out to meet them and gave them a warm welcome. Men and women were dragging large baskets of bread and fruits, smiling girls were holding out jugs of water to the soldiers.

They are Christians,” his friend, an old seasoned soldier, explained to Pimen. - Their God commands to love people and serve everyone...

“What a good Christian God! - thought the young man, - but our gods do not order this. Good faith, we should learn more about it...” Subsequently, Pimen became a great Christian ascetic. His saying is known: “Three main things are necessary for us: to fear God, to pray and to do good to our neighbors.”

“Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you,” the Savior taught(Matthew 5:40-42) . Love for neighbor among Christians is inextricably linked with the commandment of love for God and the ability to see in any needy person the “image of God,” regardless of his shortcomings. The New Testament contains a lot of appeals to mercy and compassion, and even Christ reduces the entire meaning of the Old Testament law to the commandment of love for God and neighbor. And his parable about the merciful Samaritan who saved a man who had suffered from robbers, from whom the “pious” priest and Levite who passed by turned away, is still relevant today. If we see that another person is feeling bad, our conscience should not let us pass by, even if we are busy with pious cares or family cares.

Mercy can take many forms and forms. You can help not only with money and food, but also just with a kind word. When giving alms, one should try to do it with love, from a sincere heart. And if you don’t have enough money to help someone in need, you can at least mentally pray for him so that the Lord will help and protect him.

According to the Holy Fathers, at the last universal Last Judgment, all people (including non-Christians) will be judged by God, primarily on their deeds of love and mercy. So we can say that the kind and sympathetic are doubly lucky. Even during their lifetime, having known the joy of goodness and happiness that accompanies merciful people, leaving behind a good memory, after death they will be saved from evil and will begin to live with God in a blessed, infinitely happy Eternity.

What is mercy? How to be merciful? In this material you will find a list of articles that reveal the meaning of this phenomenon, as well as read quotes about it.

Mercy: selected articles

How to understand mercy?

Be merciful as your Father is merciful (Luke 6:36), the Gospel commands us. These words make you think. After all, the Lord did not say to us, for example: "be strong, even as your Father is strong and mighty." It is all the more impossible to imagine that Christ would say something along the lines of "be fasting, like your Heavenly Father." This means that mercy is that which most likens us to God, and, on the other hand, that which is in our power.

Chulpan Khamatova: If you wait for gratitude, you will immediately break down

To what extent has the division in society affected charity? Why does the word “charity” remain unfamiliar to us? Is it scary to raise children today? Are people living in the capital and provinces different? About this and many other things, the People's Artist of Russia, co-founder of the Give Life! Chulpan Khamatova told Pravmir.

Flash Poll: What should everyday charity look like?

What is daily charity? The first association with the word "mercy" is help in an orphanage, boarding school, hospital. But this is not possible for everyone - how to engage in charity for family people who have work, children and a constant lack of time? But it also happens that a person is ready to help in hospitals and hospices, but the result of such mercy is only vanity in the soul. Is such help pleasing?

Mercy Quotes

The one who covers the transgression seeks love; and who again reminds of him, he removes the friend.

Whoever despises his neighbor sins; but he who is merciful to the poor is blessed.
Old Testament. Proverbs of Solomon

The coldness of mercy is the silence of the heart; the flame of mercy is the murmuring of the heart.
Aurelius Augustine

Let's help those poor people who beg us for it, and even if they deceive us, we shouldn't attach too much importance to it. For each of us deserves such mercy, forgiveness and kindness.
John Chrysostom

When you feed the poor, consider yourself fed. This is such a thing: what we have given will return to us.
John Chrysostom

Do you want to be shown mercy? Show mercy to your neighbor.
John Chrysostom

Mercy is never too much
Francis Bacon

Misguided mercy is not only weakness, but borders on injustice and is very harmful to society, because it encourages vice.
Henry Fielding

Too often we turn people over to the mercy of the Lord, and too seldom show mercy ourselves.
George Eliot

Almsgiving corrupts both the giver and the taker, and moreover, it does not reach its goal, because it only increases begging.
Fedor Mikhailovich Dostoevsky

Be merciful to the unfortunate, be indulgent to the happy.
Victor Marie Hugo

Shouldn't mercy be manifested with special force precisely where the fall is especially deep?
Victor Marie Hugo

... The source of evil is vanity, and the source of good is mercy.
Francois Rene de Chateaubriand

Mercy begins at home. If one has to go somewhere to show mercy, then this is hardly mercy.
Lev Nikolayevich Tolstoy

Mercy consists not so much in material help as in the spiritual support of one's neighbor. Spiritual support is primarily in non-judgment of the neighbor and respect for his human dignity.
Lev Nikolayevich Tolstoy

Almost no one thinks about death until she comes close to him. Tragic and at the same time ironic lies in the fact that all people on earth, from the dictator to the last beggar, behave as if they will live forever. If we constantly lived with the consciousness of the inevitability of death, we would be more humane and merciful.

Erich Maria Remarque, "Life on loan"

The Gospel description of the Last Judgment (see: Mt. 25:31-46) contains a very important truth: justification or condemnation is carried out according to the principle of our attitude towards people, namely: whether we were merciful to others. By showing participation or, on the contrary, indifference to a suffering person - and each suffering person carries the image of God in himself - we thereby build our inner attitude towards God: “because you did it to one of the least of these My brothers, you did it to Me” (Matt. 25:40).

The gospel, therefore, unequivocally testifies: whoever sees those in need and does not do everything in his power to help, he himself deprives himself of the hope of grace-filled fellowship with Christ. “Whoever misses an opportunity to do good,” explains St. Nikodim the Holy Mountaineer, “he not only loses the fruit of goodness, but also offends God. God sends someone in need to him, and he says: "Come later." Although he speaks to a man, it is the same as God who sent him. God will find another kind person, and the one who refuses will answer for himself.

This is the simplest way in which we can become like God. “Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful” (Luke 6:36). Not everyone is capable of acquiring lengthy, attentive prayer, keeping fasts in accordance with the Rule, gaining the deepest humility or meekness, having a sensible attitude towards life, or, even more so, ascending to the heights of about zheniya. And compassion for others is available to everyone.

At the same time, when we talk about mercy, it is important to remember that the word “mercy” means not just an act, but a special spiritual disposition. Mercy is empathy and compassion, a heartfelt desire to help the needy. For the merciful, every suffering person is dear and close. Moreover, with genuine mercy, a person gives what is his to another and rejoices.

The Prologue tells how the following pious custom was observed in one monastery from ancient times. Every year on Maundy Thursday, the poor, widows, orphans came to the monastery from all the surrounding places and took from the common property of the monks the prescribed measure of wheat, a small amount of wine and honey, and five copper coins each. So they spent the bright Resurrection of Christ without need and in joy.

Once there was a crop failure, and the price of bread rose enormously. Although the brethren had plenty of food supplies, they thought that the alms of the donors would stop during the crop failure, and suggested that the rector this year break the pious custom and not give wheat to the needy. For a long time the virtuous rector did not agree to the request of the brethren. “It is a sin to violate the charters given to us by the holy founder of the monastery,” he said, “it is a sin not to hope that the Lord will nourish us.” But since the brethren resolutely declared that they did not want to feed others to their own detriment, he answered with spiritual sorrow: “Do as you like.” And the poor, who came to the monastery with hope, returned from there in despair.

But on Holy Saturday, the monastery dean went to the granary to give out pure flour for bread. As soon as he opened the door, he felt a bad smell: all the wheat was so rotten that he had only to throw it into the river. The brethren were surprised, regretted their action and did not know what to do; and the pious abbot, calmly looking at the spoiled bread, said: “Whoever transgresses the commandment of the holy father, the founder of the monastery, does not rely on the Providence of God and does not have mercy on the poor, he must certainly be punished for disobedience. You spared five hundred measures and destroyed five thousand ... From now on, know whether you should trust in God or in your barns.

It is vain to think that one can be happy without helping others. There will never be joy in your heart if you turn away from your neighbors, refuse to help them and think only of yourself. Our soul longs for goodness and love not only from someone else, it has a need to open up to people, to bring them light and warmth. Therefore, when you do good, then you yourself become happy. A person who does not love his neighbors, who does not wish good to other people, is a flawed person. And one more thing: this man is deeply unhappy.

But even if we help a suffering person only because we see a pitiful creature in him, then our mercy is pagan. We also throw a piece of bread to the animal when we see that it is hungry. But the holy righteous John of Kronstadt says: "Know that yours is always insignificant in comparison with a person, this child of God." Christian mercy sees in the needy the image of God, albeit trampled upon by earthly vicissitudes. So we have no right not to help.

Here it is important to understand that everyone who suffers grief is God's chosen one, who is given to carry his life's cross, which, perhaps, we are not capable of. Helping such a person, we share his sorrow with him, but in the end we become partners in the election of God allotted to him.

Alas, in life one constantly has to observe the opposite situation. We do not want to be kinder and more merciful to each other. They are always dissatisfied, irritated, in relation to their neighbors they are precise in formalities: it is impossible, it is not supposed, it is not allowed. Moreover, while showing cruelty to others, we often want and seek to be treated condescendingly and kindly. We are reluctant even in a small way to meet our neighbors, and in our personal lives we strive to occupy a position in which others would be obliged to help us.

A familiar vice-rector of a theological seminary told how, having assumed an administrative position, he was faced with the need to lead others. Actually, administrative work involves constant control, demands, organization of others for work. The whole life of an administrative person turns into incessant instructions to others what and how to do, into penalties: why didn’t you do it or did it wrong? It leaves an imprint on the personality. But one day, when he was filling out an insured event in connection with damage to the car, he was informed by mobile phone that the student had agreed to sign the rector on the document, in three hours he would take the train with the documents, and the rector unexpectedly left the seminary. The only one who can still sign is the Vice-Rector. But he sits in the department of insurance claims and thinks about how to correctly file the damage, which for some reason the police did not write down everything in the protocol. The distance between them is such that the student will still be late if he goes to him first. The right decision was not born immediately. Although it was evening time and there was a child with the vice-rector who still had to prepare lessons, he decided to go to the station to meet the student at the train.

The seminarian was obviously late, and, standing on the platform, my friend began strenuously that the Lord would help. There were only a few minutes left before departure. He bought a fountain pen, which, as always at such moments, was not in his briefcase, in order to immediately sign the document. The miracle did not happen - the train left. The student came running only after three minutes, but during this time the vice-rector managed to think over what to do so that the student would not have a shock. Immediately took him to take the ticket. I immediately found out that in two hours there was another train in the same direction. Surprisingly, only one seat was free. I had to add money to buy a ticket. But in the end, everything turned out well. This means that the Lord helps us in everyday situations, but especially helps when we ourselves strive to participate in the lives of others.

The author of these lines knows many priests who help others free of charge. And these priests always experience joy, as if they do not give, but acquire themselves. Mercy always brings breadth and spaciousness to the soul, the merciful one goes beyond the narrow confines of inner self-isolation, finds freedom and joy of the heart in doing good for others, while selfishness always impoverishes life.

An egoist, like a thief, hides from others in order to snatch only for himself - he is unhappy and pitiful in self-interest and, like a mole, digs holes in the earth, away from the light, as if trying to equip his own grave with accumulations in advance.

But after all, man is a being with such deep spiritual needs that cannot be satiated by self-interest. The possession of earthly treasures will never give happiness to anyone if they are not shared with others. St. Maximus the Confessor expresses this truth in this way: "Mine is what I give to others." Because the heart rejoices only by opening itself up to meet its neighbors, and not shutting itself up. Our well-known fabulist Ivan Andreevich Krylov presented this figuratively in the fable "The Doe and the Dervish", concluding:

Yes, true goodness
He does good without any reward:
Who is good, the excess is a burden,
If he does not share them with his neighbor.

The soul cannot be happy without mercy. The heart of each of us longs for good and wants to do good, even if we do not always understand this with our sinful mind. Already in the very doing of good, a person partly tastes of paradise. A person with a merciful heart becomes spiritually rich, and therefore he perceives life more fully and vividly.

There are people who, according to the word of Scripture, “will not sleep unless they do evil” (Prov. 4:16). But there are also people who cannot sleep if they have not done good to someone. Among the saints who became famous for their special care for the poor, Patriarch John of Alexandria, nicknamed the Merciful, enjoys the greatest reverence. He spent all his money on helping the unfortunate, remaining himself in extreme poverty. Once, a noble resident of Alexandria gave him an expensive blanket, asking him to use this gift without fail. Indeed, St. John covered himself with a blanket at night, but the thought that it would be possible to help the unfortunate with money with an expensive thing did not give him rest. In the morning, John sent to sell a blanket, and distributed the proceeds to the poor. The giver saw his blanket in the market, bought it and brought it back to Saint John. But the saint of God acted in the same way even before evening, in order to fall asleep peacefully. When the giver brought the blanket for the third time, Saint John said: “I will always sell this thing that I don’t need; We will see who is the first of us to stop doing his own thing.

Anton Pavlovich Chekhov once correctly said: “It is necessary that behind the door of every contented, happy person someone with a gavel should stand and constantly remind you by knocking that there are unfortunate people, that, no matter how happy he is, life will sooner or later show he will have his claws, trouble will strike - poverty, loss, and no one will see or hear him, just as now he does not see or hear others.

Who will remind behind the door of the soul of each person with his knock of the need to do mercy? This should be, first of all, our conscience. The very essence of a person is determined by what he is alone with his conscience.

And here is how the righteous saint warns us: “Be attentive to yourself when a poor person in need of help asks you for it: the enemy will try at this time to pour coldness, indifference and even neglect on your heart to the needy; overcome these non-Christian and inhuman dispositions in yourself, arouse compassionate love in your heart for a person like you in everything, and whatever the needy asks you, fulfill his request according to your strength.

Already in his school years, he could not pass by a beggar, so as not to give him. If there was nothing to give, he always said: "I'm sorry." Once Gogol even remained in debt to a beggar woman. To her words: “Give for the sake of Christ,” he replied: “Reckon me.” And the next time she turned to him with the same request, he gave her twice, explaining: "Here is my duty."

In the Holy Scriptures, the refusal of alms is unequivocally regarded as a sin (see: Deut. 15: 7-9). And about almsgiving itself, it is said that when it is given, “your heart must not grieve” (Deut. 15:10). “Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you” (Matthew 5:42). And although there are those who ask who have turned poverty into a craft, it is not our business to sort out every time where and for what our alms will go. “Blessed are the merciful, for they will receive mercy” (Matt. 5:7), says the Savior, without discussing any conventions.

In order to learn Christian mercy, we can offer several rules:

1. Serve, albeit a little, but with. You don't have to give everything you have. Give at least a little, infringe on yourself in the smallest, but only without irritation to the person: not brushing off the poor as from an annoying fly, but wishing him well.

2. Be sure to help those people whose poverty of life you are reliably aware of - relatives, employees, acquaintances.

3. Do not condemn the poor who ask for food, but, as you think, would be able to work themselves or allegedly use your alms for no good. Everyone will answer for himself.

4. Finally, do not give alms out of a desire for praise, for the sake of visible prestige, ranking, or even just a report. Such people “already receive their reward” on earth, remaining without the reward of the Heavenly Father (see: Mt. 6:1-2).

According to St. John Chrysostom, mercy has various images. There are deeds of bodily mercy: to feed the hungry, to give drink to the thirsty, to clothe the naked or lacking the necessary clothing, to visit the sick, to receive a stranger into the house, etc. And there are spiritual deeds of mercy, which are as much higher as the soul is higher than the body. The deeds of spiritual mercy, for example, are as follows: to turn a sinner from error, to teach the unbeliever truth and goodness, to give good advice to a neighbor in difficulty or danger he does not notice, to console the sad, not to repay evil with evil, to forgive insults from the heart.

You can help with a warm prayer for him. We do not always have money with us, but prayer, as the holy fathers say, is always with us. Moreover, it is in vain to think that by providing only material assistance to another, you have fulfilled your Christian duty, as if paying off the requirements of the Gospel. The Savior calls us to raise everyone to union with God: “Let them all be one, as You, Father, are in Me, and I in You, so they too may be one in Us” (John 17:21). Prayer paves the way.

Prayer unites, graciously binds together all those for whom we say our prayers before the Lord. Therefore, prayer is an opportunity to do good to people always and everywhere.

In prayer there is no division into near and far, enemies and friends, because in the prayerful requests of a Christian everyone is placed before the All-Seeing God, and everyone is called to His eternal Kingdom.

But prayer is only prayer when it resonates in the heart of the one who prays, when the soul burns with the desire to give others eternity, to ask the Lord for this priceless gift for others, and therefore prayer from the heart is always a triumph of love and kindness, it is the beginning of victory over hostile feelings, malice and hatred.

Prayer is asking for mercy from the Lord. Praying from the heart for someone means feeling someone else's pain and reaching out to the needy, as if to take his burden, so that he himself becomes easier.

So, many means of mercy have been offered to us, and although the specific choice remains ours, one thing is certain: every step towards another, every good deed, almsgiving, selfless help and prayer for our neighbors will find their justification, adorn the soul of a merciful person and make his life more joyful and happy.

It's not always easy to be kind in a world that can get frustrating quickly, but if you make the effort to have more mercy in your daily life, you can start to change for the better. Here's how to do it.

Part 1 of 3: Be Kind to Others

1. Thank people for their efforts. One of the most important qualities of a merciful person is the ability to thank people for their efforts, no matter how big or small they are. Even if a colleague is just calling you to say something, thank them for their efforts. If a friend grabs your coffee or reminds you that your favorite show is up later, say "thank you" to them.

A big part of being kind is being able to appreciate what people do for you. How do you show your appreciation? You say "thank you".

2. Be a good listener. Merciful people don't focus on their problems, they care more about other people. Make an effort to really hear what the person is saying to you. Don't interrupt people and keep your questions to the end so that the person can finish, let him feel that you really care about him.

Don't forget the details of what the person says so you can come back to them later. If someone mentions that his sister just had a baby girl, the next time you see him, you can ask how his little niece is doing; the person will be pleasantly surprised that you remember this.

Show empathy. If the person is upset, you can say, “I can't imagine what you've been through. It must be so difficult because…” Let the person see that you really heard what he told you.

3. Pay attention to others. Being merciful means paying attention to people in social situations. Instead of worrying about who to talk to or what to say next, you should monitor other people's feelings and moods to see if they are worried or anxious and understand how they interact with each other. It is important to notice what they think and others feel.

A merciful person understands that other people are just as important as he is. That is why it is so important to pay attention to them.

4. Give people the benefit of the doubt. Merciful people are not looking for ways to humiliate a person, criticize him or make him feel like a small fry. They do exactly the opposite. Even if they are unsure of a person's intentions, they try to stick to positive things and imagine that people also want the best for everyone. Instead of gossiping or saying something negative about a person you don't know, imagine that they are a good person, just like you.

If you get in the habit of doing this, you'll have a kind of reputation for being a charitable person rather than a banal gossip, and people will want to spend even more time with you.

5. Compliment others. Merciful people always look for the good in people and therefore invest in making others feel good. Not because it will make people "bigger", but in the most direct, genuine way, it will make them want to trust you in return. Look around. Compliment not only the most obvious things, but also the things that people work hard at.

If you don't feel like giving a compliment, don't do it just to appear nice. But if you make a habit of praising people, you'll be better able to navigate the moments when people really deserve a compliment.

6. Have mercy instead of victory. If you want to be merciful, then remember that it is more important for everyone to be happy than for you to be right. Instead of proving your point, arguing with the person next to you (even if you're sure you're right), you should be kind to them, change the subject, or say something like, "I think we should just agree." . Swallowing your pride may not be fun, but no one argues that this is the only way to look good. There's nothing merciful about that, is there?

If you really have the urge to argue with or correct someone, just count down from ten and tell yourself that it's really worth it. What will you get from this?

7. Let other people talk. Do you really have to post everything that's on your mind all the time? Most likely, others also have something to say. If you and someone else start talking at the same time, insist that your competitor be first. Ask lots of questions instead of talking about yourself and show that you are really interested in people. This does not mean that you need to turn into a shy quiet person if that is not who you really are. It simply means that you should let other people do the talking instead of being the center of the conversation yourself.

If two people are arguing in front of you, please change the subject.

8. Let others be first. To be merciful is to say "after you" in the literal and figurative sense. If you want to be charitable, you must give someone else the right to order ice cream before you decide to kill your chocolate craving, or else you let the car turn around in front of you.

This does not mean that you should let people walk in front of you all the time. This means that you must give in to others when it is reasonable.

Part 2 of 3: Developing Compassionate Qualities

1. Be humble. Merciful people are always humble. They don't brag about how big or showy they are; instead, they act modestly and wait for other people to celebrate their accomplishments. They don't call attention to themselves, they are in awe of the big and complex world, and they don't walk into a room like they own the place. If you want to be humble, then just be and don't brag about it.

Always trust other people. If someone says that you did a great job on a project, say that you couldn't have done it without the help of your other colleagues.

2. Be respectful. Treat other people with kindness and respect, even if they don't always deserve it. Be punctual if you said you were going to be somewhere at a certain time. Hold the door for people. Don't text your friends or get distracted when you should be fully focused on the other person. Look straight in the eye, don't swear, and treat people kindly, regardless of their social status or their position.

Treat people with respect no matter what they can do for you.

3. Be tactful. This means not saying anything offensive, out of the ordinary, or just plain weird. Tactful people think before they speak, and are quite careful if they have to say something unpleasant, as if they were to tell a person that they have something stuck in their teeth. Understand what you are saying and also how you say it. This means that your comment may be misinterpreted due to your tone or the words you use.

Use tact. Use words so that they do not cause a stir. If you know you're walking with two people who have opposing views on the rule of the president, don't bring that topic up in the conversation.

4. Be generous. Generous people are capable of giving, whether it be their time, their money, or their love and kindness. Be the person who is always looking for a way to help others, whether we're talking about your closest friends or complete strangers who need help. Be generous with your time. Of course, helping a friend clean the apartment will not be very pleasant, but he will appreciate your help, since he was overwhelmed by these dumps in the apartment after the divorce.

Being generous means acknowledging opportunities when you can help. Your sick friend may not say that he would be very happy if you brought him chicken soup for lunch, but that does not mean that he will not appreciate it.

5. Learn to accept compliments. It is important to receive compliments correctly if you really want to be charitable. Say "thank you" to people for their compliments and show how much their words mean to you. You shouldn't downplay them and say you don't deserve it; pretending to be overly modest can start to annoy people a little.

If you can return the compliment, that would be great.

6. Handle criticism appropriately. Merciful people know how to handle criticism, constructive or not. If the criticism is constructive, then you should see value in it, learn something from it, and make a plan to change or improve the quality you were criticized for. And if the criticism is only meant to offend you, you can let it roll down your back and be taller without saying something negative about the person in return.

7. Be grateful. Kind people act in their own way because they know how to count their blessings instead of focusing on the hardships they have to face. They know exactly what they should be grateful for, whether it be their health, their friends, their family, and/or their opportunities, and they never forget any of these things for a second.

If you really feel like you're in a dump somewhere, it will help to write a thank you list. It can include all the things you are grateful for, and you can add points to it whenever something happens to you. May you have time to read this list and smile. It can make you feel more grateful no matter how bad your day was.

Part 3 of 3: Do your best

1. Get involved in volunteering. Give your time to people who really need it. Do this at least once a week and see how much you can do for the people around you and how much they can change your life for the better. You have to do it voluntarily because you really feel the difference, how much kinder you become when you see the problems that others are having.

You will see that the people you help will help you as much as you help them. Volunteering can make you feel more grateful for all the benefits you have and give you a fresh perspective.

2. Do favors for other people. If you really want to be merciful, you must not only help your friends when they really need you; you should say thank you to them just because they were good friends or because you know they need a little encouragement. Cook dinner for your friends, help with the laundry, or take your car to work when their car breaks down. Help your mom clean the floor. You will become more compassionate.

If you have a good relationship, you will receive some favors in return and you will feel happy.

3. Admit your mistakes. Merciful people know that they are not perfect and are ready to admit their shortcomings. Whether you said something hurtful to a friend or ruined something at work, it's important to acknowledge that you're not perfect and set yourself the goal of improving yourself next time. It is much more important to admit your shortcomings than to deny them in order to save face and look tough. Of course, it will be unpleasant, but you will be more kind, and people around you will respect you more if you admit your mistakes and apologize for them.

4. Write "thank you" on cards. Sending these cards to people is another great way to show your appreciation. Say "thank you" to your teachers, colleagues, or other important people who make your life better and make it a habit. You don't even have to be so formal: thank your best friends, your significant other, or even your neighbors for helping you through a difficult time. Try sending at least one thank you card each month and you'll be even more aware of all the things you should be grateful for.

5. Show people that you really care about them. It makes people feel important. Get good grades to show your teachers that you respect them and follow their good teaching rules. Follow your parent's advice on what to do and listen to their opinion. Do things that make you and other people feel great. They will feel important because you took the time to learn from them.

• Smile and appreciate everything around you.
• Offer to help younger siblings with their homework, comfort them when they're sad, or play with them when they're bored. They will appreciate it and will maintain a good relationship with you.
• Respect your friends. Your friends make you feel uplifted. Try your best to thank them or get together more often to get closer to them.
• If it's your parents' birthday, prepare a gift and a special card to show how much you care about them and that you've taken the time to put things aside and celebrate their birthday.

Warnings

• If you ever fight with your parents, listen to their opinion and try to learn from your mistakes. Never shout or blame them for ruining your life.
• Never lie to get out of a situation. Do your job and let people know that you are an honest person. Be sure to tell the truth in every situation.