Sociotype Dostoevsky. Male and female portraits, descriptions and comparisons, photos, videos

Dr. Watson, Humanist, Psychologist)

Direct map:
Women are small, puny, with underdeveloped breasts and an unexpressed waist. The woman is a child. Men are also short, with thin bones.

Reversed card:
Tall, men have strong bones, and Long hands, legs and neck. The women are also tall, but for the most part very thin and somehow charmingly awkward. They have everything long - a long face, a long back, long hands and long fingers.

This card is also characterized by large expressive eyes with long eyelashes, beautifully defined lips, regular, delicate facial features.

The Page of Staves is indeed a great psychologist. He subtly feels and deeply understands human nature and easily understands the relationships between people. Usually friendly and polite, in communication he tries to keep some distance. He believes that rapprochement requires complete openness, honesty and gullibility, as well as a subtle understanding of each other without words, which, alas, is not often possible. Therefore, he prefers, being fairly open, to still maintain his self-sufficiency. He is truly humane, but this humanity is very wide-ranging. It is much easier to love all of humanity than specific people who are not always honest and decent, which is important for the Page of Staffs. It is easier for him to forgive his enemies than to understand and forgive the dishonesty of his friends. The Page of Staves miraculously combines softness and pliability and fundamental inaccessibility. He is generously gentle in everything that does not concern his principles, and he defends them with amazing steadfastness.

The desire for self-education is highly developed in him, by this he easily captivates others and therefore is an interesting educator, especially in the humanitarian and spiritual areas. It is easy for him to see the abilities and capabilities of a single person and society as a whole, he can even advise on this matter with pleasure, but he quickly becomes bored with someone’s individual development. Usually tactful by nature, the Page of Staves nevertheless needs to be taught certain norms of cultural behavior, which comes easily to him. And later he himself can become a legislator of good manners.

The Page of Staves has truly enormous reserves of patience. Therefore, he does not even have to force himself to be disciplined and hardworking. Unfortunately, women of this type are often caught on this hook, ceasing to look for themselves, patiently enduring all the vicissitudes of their hard life and not trying to change at least something. Because of their love for structure and craving for abstract white logic, many of them find themselves working in accounting, economics, where their crystal-clear honesty and principles are often infringed. The Page of Staves is an excellent performer, meticulous and very responsible. He is ready not only to do the job, but to check and double-check everything more than once. Examines all situations and tries to resolve them objectively and without emotion.

He cannot stand rudeness and rudeness, he cannot stand forceful pressure and he never presses. In critical situations, he tries to leave as soon as possible and take his loved ones away, but not to enter into open confrontation. If this cannot be avoided, it will desperately defend itself, but will never attack first. If you have to punish someone, he becomes verbose and internally agitated - he reads morality for a long and tedious time, leaving in streamlined phrases and trying not to offend anyone.

He is inspired by people who are passionate about their work. Maybe even start helping. In addition, the Page of Staves is conscientious and it is embarrassing for him to sit idle when someone is working nearby. He does his work with pleasure, preparing for a long time before starting - for example, laying out tools, or performing other almost ritual actions. By the way, the Page of Staffs is inwardly deeply grateful to those who can organize for him workplace and make it convenient and comfortable. Appreciating these conveniences, he himself can rarely remember to arrange them for himself. Often he needs very detailed, precise instructions, which he delves into for a long time, asking questions and asking again. But to his credit it must be added that he remembers these instructions forever and then does everything exactly.

The Page of Staves tends to miscalculate their strength and often overworks. For recovery and normal functioning, he needs a lot of sleep, 9-10 hours for men and 10-11 hours for women and children. When he does not get enough sleep, he becomes lethargic, plunges into pessimism and apathy, and may even get sick. His sensory habits are quite unusual - unpretentious in one, he often becomes picky in another. For example, for a good rest, he can sleep on the floor, but so that there would be no one else in the room. Or he won’t, for example, eat food for dinner that he ate with great pleasure for lunch.

His metabolism is slow, he practically does not sweat, gets dirty a little, and can do with rare meals.
Very emotional and worried, the Page of Staffs hides their emotions, preferring to be calm, reserved and somewhat distant in public. He empathizes and sympathizes with other people, he can even listen and encourage, and even inspire, open up new perspectives. He himself also needs a similar emotional discharge, but rarely finds an understanding and sympathetic listener, and therefore is prone to nervous breakdowns, out of the blue. If there is someone nearby who can cheer up with understanding and love, then the Page of Staffs goes to the other extreme. He begins to consider himself a great one, to whom everything is subject and by whose slightest move of a finger the fate of the world is decided.

The page of staffs is quite viscous. Everything is measured and calm with him, even changes. This Page does not like to change his temporary habits, although he does not particularly hold on to them. He does not like to waste time, but he does not hurry and drive horses. There is a time for everything, and it goes somehow on its own, and the Page of Staffs lives on its own, intersecting with time only in the presence of third parties at appointments, where the Page of Staffs is usually punctual. Sometimes, having departed completely from time to time, he makes appointments not at the exact time, but for example, he says that he will be able to come in from 12 to 1, leaving behind some freedom of maneuver. He always clearly separates the time of work and the time of entertainment. And if someone forces him to take an unplanned break, grumbles, but then he is grateful, especially if this break allows him to warm up a little.

The Page of Staves dresses elegantly enough, trying to wear expensive clothes (he then feels completely different), beautiful and at the same time discreet. He does not like business suits, preferring styles that are softer, more refined and at the same time not pretentious, simple. Often he needs advice about the choice of clothing and, moreover, additions. Because being a subtle connoisseur of aesthetics, he is precisely a connoisseur, not a creator.

From the reflections of the Page of staffs or about it.
Can you be happy if the world is not completely happy? And can the world be happy if you are unhappy?
I took a bite of a lemon and the world was skewed.
All people are sleeping gods.
From the conversation: you just need to see the essence.
— Do you see her?
- I? I see.
“Then teach me.
- Teach? No, I can't. You just look and see. Or you don't see.

List of recommended films.
1 . "Young Catherine" - the woman of Count Vorontsov
2 . “Only old men go into battle” - Grasshopper
3 . "The sky in diamonds" - the poet Lobikov
4 . “I want to go to prison” - one of the prisoners, a musician, studied Russian.
5 . "Trip" - one of the main characters (the owner of the car)
6 . "Third extra" - homeless (he was the third)

Natalia Plaksina - Socioinka in Tarot cards

Female portrait of Don Quixote by Lyubov Beskova

Dostoevsky. Female portrait

Quiet, friendly, even meek - such epithets come to mind when it comes to girls like DOSTOYEVSKY. The face is often with wide cheekbones, a graceful chin and large, radiant eyes. There are also narrow faces, very youthful until very late years. The look of representatives of this type is soft and compassionate. An unobtrusive, kind smile often lingers on their face for a long time. This girl is always ready to listen and support others, and if necessary, give quiet comfort and inspire hope.

Women of this type are very feminine and delicate, modest and even shy. But that doesn't mean they're spineless. Not at all. They have a special, meek, stoic manner to accept all the hardships and blows of fate.

They have a very ephemeral body, often there is a slight stoop. They dress rather modestly, trying not to attract special attention. And with age, and in general, they begin to choose mostly something dark and inconspicuous.

School life allows them from childhood to begin to develop obedience and diligence in themselves. These are quiet, diligent girls who will never argue with teachers. And even if they are unfairly given grades, they do not grumble, explaining the situation to themselves in some way so that the authority of the teacher does not suffer.

In the class, this girl, as a rule, has a couple of best friends, with whom she stands at recess against the wall and in a quiet voice, with dignity, discusses all the events of school life. She does not like to gossip, she tries to evaluate everything objectively, so that there are no guilty or offended. This is one of the most decent girls in the class.

Humanitarian inclinations are manifested in girls of this type very clearly. They are well versed in the vicissitudes of the personal life of all the heroes of literary works, which are studied under the program, and write the best essays in the class. In addition, they read a lot in addition to the program, write poetry and prose themselves, as a result of which their character acquires strongly romanticized features. This is, in fact, one of the most dreamy girls in the class.

Representatives of this type for the most part do not like to engage in sports. But in childhood and youth they like to dance. This occupation corresponds to their romantic, lyrical mood. And, most often, they prefer ballroom or classical dances.

Girls like DOSTOYEVSKY always enter the institute, because they study well at school, often graduating with a gold medal, and in general they make the most pleasant impression on the examiners with their excellent education, ability to behave with dignity, quiet voice and good knowledge. But it would be better if this girl chooses a humanitarian field for herself than goes to study as an engineer.

If you thought that girls of this type never have fun in companies, then you are wrong. But the company should be its own, where they are noticed, loved and appreciated. There, this quiet flower opens in all its glory towards friendship, love and good, warm fun. Keep in mind that she will not stay in friends where they swear or abuse alcohol next to her. She has her own, and very high demands on others. The man she dreams of must be correct, reliable, intelligent and self-confident.

When the girl DOSTOYEVSKY becomes your wife, know that a quiet angel now lives in your home. However, he has such a developed sense of duty that he will not disdain to clean, wash and cook. Of course, she does not like to cook, this is not what she sees as her calling. But she will never leave her family without food. And if one of the family members is so picky that she wants to eat only freshly prepared food, she will cook three times a day. That's how she's made.

She also cares about the health of her family, and therefore diligently writes in a special notebook (which she will keep all her life) not only cooking recipes, but also the compositions herbal preparations, as well as the most necessary medications which may be useful in certain diseases.

Not only the husband, but also the parents on both sides, and the children will be embraced by her warm attitude. She will find time for everyone, an opportunity to help, as well as friendly words for the occasion. She takes care of the children. Moreover, he does it with pleasure and all his life. She knows everything about their spiritual structure, about the problems of their inner world, makes sure that they study well, strives to comprehensively develop their abilities, educates them gently but persistently. But it is difficult for her to make serious decisions when it is necessary to place a child in a school or choose an institute for him. However, this applies not only to problems related to children. So it's best to take care of identifying important milestones in the development of your family. She will gladly submit to you.

From life: "When I read E. Bern's "Games People Play", I thought, what kind of fairy tale corresponded to my life scenario in childhood? And I remembered that when I was little, my favorite fairy tale was about a princess, who didn’t have to do anything, because by magic everything around her was done by itself. So I dreamed about this, so that someone would come and do everything that needed to be done, and I wouldn’t have to do anything all my life ".

By the way, this quiet, warm, domestic woman is one of the most obedient wives. She loves her family with an even, warming love. But make sure that her entire spiritual resource is not wasted on girlfriends who exploit your wife as a psychotherapist. She herself, of course, will never refuse them. Out of compassion. Therefore, it will be right if you take matters into your own hands and somewhat limit the flow of those who want to receive a psychotherapeutic session from her and helpful advice.

Women of this type always show themselves very well in any job. They are friendly and responsible, never quarrel and do not demand anything for themselves, hoping that sooner or later they will be noticed and appreciated. They also consciously avoid getting involved in intrigues, spreading gossip and discussing someone behind their back.

They make wonderful teachers, editors, proofreaders, librarians, psychologists. They are good wherever you need to show patience and compassion for people. There are times when they even work as engineers, but, according to their own estimates, this work does not bring them much satisfaction. However, since they are always stoic, they do not complain about it.

Socionics is a science that studies the peculiarities of a person's perception of information from the surrounding world, his reaction to certain factors, and a behavioral model formed on the basis of this. The foundation of the doctrine is the sensations and emotions of the individual, his logical thinking and evaluative qualities. Analyzing them, scientists divide people into 16 types. In this article, we will analyze one of their psychotypes, which is studied by socionics. Dostoevsky, namely, he will be discussed below, is a friendly person who likes to silently observe others more than to actively maintain a conversation.

Boy-Dostoevsky

According to socionics, Dostoevsky-man is a born intellectual. Since childhood, he is delicate and tactful, loves to read and learn. Likes to wear long hair, collected in a ponytail, and modest clothes. His voice is quiet, his gaze is meek, and his smile is affectionate. When you talk to him, it's impossible to lie. There is a feeling that conscience itself is looking into your eyes. It is impossible not to believe him, he perfectly understands people, goes to meet them halfway. Able to empathize, console and share the hardships of the interlocutor.

Quiet, inconspicuous and obedient - this is how socionics characterizes the boy. Dostoevsky maintains friendly relations with all the children in the class. He does not participate in fights, as he believes that any trouble can be resolved peacefully. Not ambitious, so he does not fight for leadership. He studies well, especially he succeeds in mathematics. But it is not science that occupies him more, but the personal life of classmates, which he observes, analyzing and drawing conclusions.

Youth

Upon admission to higher educational institution prefers the humanities. Getting an education, there are not enough stars from the sky, trying to get lost among the students. But among the Dostoevskys there are also truly unique personalities who can easily finish Harvard University with honors. The young man does not like sports. But you can get into yoga. In addition, he likes skiing, as well as any entertainment where an instant reaction and iron endurance are required from the participant.

Constantly being in society is the main goal pursued by Dostoevsky. Socionics describes this psychotype as follows: despite the quiet, sometimes closed nature, he loves the company of people, tries in every possible way to keep the conversation going on any topic. The character of the young man is flexible and soft. Already at this age, he is popular with women. Since he is a very gallant, attentive gentleman with a sense of humor and good manners.

Family life

From young men of this type are obtained good husbands: loyal, caring and gentle. There is absolutely no aggression in them - and socionics makes a strong emphasis on this character trait. Dostoevsky the man will never raise his hand against a woman, he will not furiously prove his case. If he disagrees with something, then he will simply quietly do as he sees fit, since he will never deviate from principles. In the house, Dostoevsky knows how to maintain a pleasant, friendly atmosphere: he jokes with all family members, he often has a playful mood.

Communicating with children, chooses analogous tactics. It is absolutely non-confrontational. This is not a strict father, but a friend-educator who respects the kids, knows how to interest them, convey life experience, spiritual landmarks and their lofty goals. Here is what else he writes about this eternal romance of socionics: “Dostoevsky has a huge reserve of patience. But if you still managed to offend him, a meek look and eyes full of sadness will make you simply fall into the ground from the realization of your own worthlessness and stupidity.

Characteristics of a girl

Cutie - this is how you can call a young lady who belongs to the Dostoevsky psychotype (socionics). A woman is already kind and accommodating from the cradle, so she does not cause unnecessary grief and trouble to her parents. She is very charming, delicate, modest and shy. Despite her fragility, she has amazing resilience when problems hit like snow on her head. The eyes of such a girl always glow, a spark wanders in them, a light. He dresses modestly so as not to draw too much attention.

At school, she is a diligent and diligent student. He does not argue with teachers: even if the assessment is unfair, he will remain silent. The authority of a teacher is dearer to her than her own. The girl has few friends: usually a few classmates, just as quiet and modest, with whom she discusses the events of school life in a corner at a break. Inclined to the humanities: she writes the best essays, invents poetry. Literature influences her character, giving him the features of a romantic nature.

Young years

According to socionics, Dostoevsky, in which a female portrait is very similar to a male one, is usually always a delicate and fragile creature. She doesn’t like sports, but she loves to dance - this activity most closely matches her image of a “lyrical young lady”. Such girls often finish school with a gold medal, after which they must enter the university. Treat teachers courteously and with dignity, which impresses them and evokes sympathy. Her knowledge is solid and her demeanor modest.

Despite this, the Dostoevsky girl (socionics) likes to have fun. A woman prefers a society where she is valued and loved, I notice and allow her to open up. Here she can loosen up, chirping cheerfully with friends or flirting with potential suitors. By the way, the man she dreams of must be reliable, intelligent and self-confident. And most importantly - correct. A man who swears and abuses alcohol will never win her heart.

Marriage with a Dostoevsky woman

This is the case when the husband was lucky. Such a spouse is a quiet angel, who has the most developed sense of duty and responsibility. Do not grumble, will cook, wash, iron, darn, clean. To be honest, housework does not attract her, but she will never refuse to do them. And if the husband requires constantly fresh food, he will cook three times a day, without repeating a single dish. He takes care of the health of the household, so he diligently writes down recipes for herbal preparations for all kinds of diseases.

Neither children nor old parents will be deprived of her attention. She will play with the kids and learn her lessons. Pensioners will constantly visit, call several times a day, being interested in the health of even the most distant relative. Sometimes it is difficult for her to make important decisions. According to socionics, Dostoevsky the girl in such cases relies on a man: she will listen to his opinion with pleasure and will definitely follow the indicated path.

Career for men and women

Dostoevsky always loves to live according to plan. Socionics characterizes the relationship of this psychotype to work as follows: rigor, clarity and adherence to principles. Therefore, they always make excellent workers: thorough, punctual, responsible. They always fulfill the plan, pass the work standards on time, sincerely root for the common cause. Their inherent human qualities allow them to occupy a special niche in the team. Employees appreciate and respect them for their reliability, responsiveness, ability to help and listen.

Their abilities can be shown in different areas life. Here is what socionics says about these personalities: “Dostoevsky chooses different professions - from technical to humanitarian. He also makes an excellent teacher. And an equally talented engineer. Representatives of this psychotype can also become journalists, editors, librarians, designers. But the career of a psychologist is most suitable for them, because by nature these people have a rare gift to penetrate into the subconscious of the interlocutor.

This is the first public work of my new project "psychotype from the inside", which I am conducting for those whom I have personally diagnosed.The goal of the project is to become aware of yourself, to get a deeper, more multifaceted awareness of your personal qualities. Create the most objective description of your personality, through the prism of your psychotype.
This paper was written a few months after the diagnosis.
The essay was not written in one sitting. It was written gradually. She could not voice some moments, so I had to guide her, prompt her, help her in the selection of words and expressions, therefore, perhaps some places will seem strange to you, but all this fully characterizes her as a person, with all the pluses and cons.After the essay was finished, she said "... it became brighter for me to live, much, I feel needed, and in general, I feel so much about your project ...". I am sure that in a year, she will write about herself a little differently.
When you begin to realize yourself, when you grope for your root, then much changes in life. But the next heroine, who already wrote an essay to me last year, will tell you about this, and she is writing now, explaining in detail what has changed for her during this time.
I really like to observe people, to recognize them, to look at them. Almost everyone has something special that can be seen if you look closely. Because of this, it’s great to go to meetings where strangers gather, including socionic gatherings: it’s interesting how people behave when you see them for the first time, how they manifest themselves, what they say: I pass this information through myself and give it in the form of emotions and feelings, both positive and negative.
I am an introvert and I am much more interested in watching a situation unfold before my eyes than in being involved in it. I like to be at rehearsals when people still don't quite know what exactly they should do, they are looking for themselves within the given limits, without resorting to such conventions as makeup and scenery. I am a good listener, I used to be able to hang on the phone for hours while I was told endless intricate dreams and plots of the books I read. At the age of eighteen, one of the Internet acquaintances whom I met for the first time said that my introversion is close to autism and I need to communicate more with people.
Being inconspicuous is hard, so now I try to be more open, my work is connected with communication with people, and I really like it. It is important for me that people like me, when I feel that I am welcome, I can be quite interesting.
I see both good and bad in people. Someone has more than one, someone has more than the other, but I still like to talk about the good, although this does not mean that I do not see the other. It's just more interesting - and safer. "Safer" is not a random word, because I often get scared. The desire to get rid of fear and moves me, pushes all my feelings and experiences outward. To get rid of fear, I try to fill myself with positive feelings and emotions. I want people to smile at each other more, love each other and not quarrel.
It is important for me to see something and turn it into an emotion. If the emotion is positive, then euphoria sets in, due to which the feeling of fear recedes. If the emotion is negative, then you want to run away, hide, become invisible, small, imperceptible.
I thought about why Dosticks are credited with such qualities as sensuality, compassion, admiration, kindness, impressionability, rich imagination. Why these particular qualities? Probably, it is they who help us survive, because the world is not as good as I would like: news alone is worth something.
I am very frightened when people swear, speak in raised tones. At this moment it always seems to me that this cannot end with something good. It is especially bad if relatives swear because of something, at such moments you realize your complete helplessness in the face of the unfolding elements.
Do you know why the Dostiks cannot live without love? Because love is one of the brightest emotions, causing a feeling of deep euphoria, fullness. When I am in love, and especially when the love is mutual, I understand that there is someone who needs me, and there is someone who is worth living for. I really need to create emotional, sensual connections, take care of someone and receive care in return. It is vitally important for me to love someone, and it can be a person, and the weather outside the window, and cats, and some everyday things. I like being taken care of; theoretically, I can take care of myself and myself - I live alone in a strange city - but this is not very easy for me. Everything that is connected with everyday things, I try to postpone until later, at the moment when it is already impossible not to do it. So I've been going to start cooking for a week now in order to eat right, but for now I only buy yogurts in the morning.
I always want to once again feel parental love and attention. I do not want to brag, but I am really a gentle and affectionate person who needs affection, care and tenderness.
I can rejoice at a random ray of sunshine, every blade of grass breaking through the snow in spring, clouds, trees, nature, etc. Noticing that there is so much good, bright, warm around, I enjoy, I get positive emotions. But now, apparently, there was another reason to say that the Dostiks are kind, sympathetic, impressionable and compassionate and whiny.
Tears bring up feelings. Tears come from within. Tears are the words of my heart. Sometimes you just want to cry. After that, you feel relief, peace, peace.
The state of hysteria, it happens extremely rarely to me. But if you see my hysteria, then I need love and attention. At this point, I just need a hug. Hold tight and I'll calm down.
Being kind-hearted, compassionate, I easily fall into emotion, sentimentality about them without. I care more for others than for myself. My cult is a stupid cult of modesty and unobtrusiveness. I constantly feel like a helpless, shy, fearful being. And in these moments I understand that I do not want to be like that!
When I fall in love, I feel a strong emotional attachment to the one I love. The feelings and sensations that I have for the one I love are important to me, they are diverse, and I can only live by them. When there is love, then life is no longer scary.
I always want to feel and give love, Give my tenderness, my attention: I look at my beloved, smile at him, cheer him up, tell him kind and warm words, there are so many of them in me. I feel very happy.
Sincerity, openness, frankness - this is what I expect from a loved one.
I have a lot of desire to mirror a person, to become like him, to understand exactly how he feels the world. If I don’t like what kind of person I become next to another, I think that we don’t fit together, and I run away. But while a person is interesting to me, I quickly get into everything that he likes, trying to understand whether I like the same thing: so once I studied Grof and some specific physical areas for quite some time, because it was interesting to the person I admired.
When I do something, it is important for me to know that there is a person who can appreciate what I did. When I am in love with a person who can draw, I start trying to draw something myself; if in the one who takes pictures, then I start wandering around the city with a camera; if in someone who likes to read, I try to rhyme. These are my attempts to get attention. Attempts to show that we are similar.
The more we know each other or the more we match at first sight, the easier it is for me to be myself; over time, I begin to sing, pretty out of tune, make fun and act stupid. If I'm being ironic, I'm showing my intellectual superiority. Sometimes I can be arrogant, arrogant, snob. If I treat you like this, it means either I feel my strength or I just want to dislike you. When I don't like something, I prefer to run away rather than change the situation. The same applies to relationships with people: rather than expressing what I don’t like, trying to change a person, it’s easier for me to disappear from sight.
In a conversation, I usually control what I say, try not to talk too much about myself, especially some non-standard things: first, I get to know the person as much as possible, trying to predict what his reaction to my words will be. If most likely it will be negative, I do not develop a topic that can be controversial.
I was once asked why Dostik is a psychologist? Probably because in order to be a psychologist by nature, you need to be able to understand the emotional background of another person, empathize with him, be able to listen. When you have these qualities, then people themselves open their inner world to you.
When they say about the Dostiks that they are trying to feel sorry for everyone, for some reason they do not mention what the root of this desire is. Why do children want to be bought a pet? Because when we lack parental love, lack emotional connection, we feel unwanted!
This should serve as the first signal that Dostik lacks love and care. Feeling useless is the worst thing that a Delta Quadra representative can experience.

You are probably reading and thinking that I am such a sweetheart. It's just because I like to write in such a cute way. And so, of course, there are also dark sides in me, there are many of them, although I do not focus on them. I do not have the courage to demonstrate them both in reality and in virtual life.
Of course, I want to seem strong, but it turns out something pink and shapeless.
I must be very naive. For example, it is surprising to me that there are people who do not respond to friendliness in the same way. I do not want to say that this must be so - if they are friends with me, then I should be friends in return - but if a person shows friendliness, then I definitely have a desire to be friends. Even if before that there was a very unpleasant experience of communicating with this person, I want to immediately force everything out and start communicating well. It is, of course, stupid to start making friends like this without exploring what is behind the manifestations of this person, but it is surprising to me that people can react to friendly manifestations in a different way: alienation, hostility, fear. As, for example, in a post on SV.
Despite the fact that I often noticed this, I still remain confident that all people are the same as me - they will respond to friendship with friendship, despite the experience of communicating with those who react differently.
At first I was sure that if they don’t make friends with me, the problem is in me, in my unpleasant manifestations. But now that has changed, and I understand that people may not be friends with me because they don't want to, and not necessarily because they don't want to be with me in particular - they may just not want to be friends with anyone.
My positivism, perhaps, can be associated with the phrase "everything is just beginning." There is confidence that I can change, that I want this, that there is an infinite amount of cool ahead. I perceive. herself as a girl just starting to live: everything that has happened so far is just a preparatory period before what is happening now. My journey is just beginning, and after a while a new one will begin, and what I am living now will also be just a preparation for it. I perceive life as an infinity, developing as if in a spiral; everyone new round- This new life, quite different, much more interesting.
I often have a background confidence that there are changes ahead, an interesting life. I like to live some moments with pleasure: for example, to look at the snow flying from the dark sky in the light of a lantern. At such moments, I know for sure that there is a lot of beauty ahead. Probably, this expresses my subconscious sharpening under the dual: when a person is worried, makes sudden conclusions, I can say: "Relax, everything is just beginning, everything will be fine."
I am afraid to admit what I blame myself for, and this list is very long.
I do not love myself for jealousy and envy; for the fact that I "stick" to those whom I fall in love with. It’s hard for me to be far from the one I love, but on the other hand, I don’t want this person to know that I don’t have a life without him, this is too vulnerable a position, and I’m waiting for him to find time for me. Sometimes I want to be able to show a little more selfishness, I would like to be able to force a person to be around, but I reproach myself for such desires, because it is important for me that a person himself comes to me, understands that he is better with me than without me. I try to create all the conditions without speaking, and because of this wordlessness, I do not get as much in return as I need.
I can’t admit to myself that I’m not so good (after all, I try so hard to become just that); I blindly want to be good and can't even afford to be anything else; much more often I distinguish my “non-terrible” defilements, but I almost don’t remember the “terrible” ones, I quickly push them out and generally tend to push out everything bad, turn a blind eye to it, pretend that bad simply does not exist.
I don't like myself because I often don't put in enough effort; for reacting hysterically to some quite normal words; for wasting a lot of time; for constantly asking if the person next to me wants to do what we do, trying to forget about ourselves; for wanting to post this list as an attempt to pressure pity; for dramatization, turning life into a series; for self-condemnation; for the fact that I can’t be tough and adapt to everyone; for paranoia and psychopathy like the one I wrote about above; for the fact that only rationally I understand that this is paranoia; for not writing here in detail about jealousy, envy and resentment: I had to let everyone know what a monster I really am, otherwise they will think that I am sincere and cute and undeservedly condemn myself.

I am sure that it is necessary to meet the expectations of other people (be polite), you can not "strain" them with your "whims". For example, in a minibus, someone asks to stop 50 meters from the place where it is convenient for me to get off. There is anxiety, a desire to get out now and thoughts: “Why bother the driver with a request to stop again after 50 meters? We set off, and there is a desire to ask to stop in a plaintive voice, and be sure to say “please” - “I’m stressing him so much,” and when I got out, I was already crippled from the desire to say “Thank you”, to make amends for disturbing the driver with her request. This is only four minutes of life, and so many manifestations of cockroaches.
In general, I often have a desire to complain to someone. Then I start looking for candidates for the role of the victim and at the same time I hate this desire in myself.
I love myself and that's why I'm sorry. I believe that everything that I do is not so terrible, and I will repay a hundredfold for my plaintive stories, because if they love me, how sincerely I can love in return.
I do not consider myself uninteresting, I know that I am good, I correct myself in order to be like that when I feel bad, it seems to me that this world is unfair. When I feel bad, it seems unworthy of me to blame others for it, it seems wrong to me to blame myself for it, so I try to change the conditions in which I am.
And from a person who is dear to me, I would take a family pat on the back. I would be glad if someone just hugged me from time to time. I really miss this.
Once they wrote to me: “When you come to me, it will be summer, and we will lie side by side, and then you will fall asleep, and I will cover you with a light blanket.” I still enjoy thinking about it :)

I want to be with someone, talking about something pleasant, and not complaining, so as not to look like a fool in the eyes of the other person. I am ashamed of the desire to complain, I constantly suppress it, and all the same - it seems that I have already exhausted everyone. And being good and suffering is quite an attractive image, you can look at yourself from the side and think that yes, this is probably right, yes, baby, there are so many hardships in your life - but in fact most of them are just invented. I still suppress not only from shame, but also from pride, because of the confidence that they will not understand me, that they will use it against me, they will tell mutual acquaintances or completely strangers. Therefore, I can only be pathetic next to those whom I trust, even though it is dishonest in relation to such people.
Sometimes I understand very clearly that right now you can experience something attractive, but I feel sentimentality and self-pity - and I can’t eliminate them, I knock them down - and they immediately return with renewed vigor, because now I feel desire to be sad, but there is no desire to experience pleasure.
When I feel bad, I feel sorry for myself, but since I am the cause of my suffering, I begin to despise myself for this.
Since childhood, I have been attracted to the image of " strong woman”: she constantly suffers, she “does not show it”: outwardly she is doing well, she keeps her suffering “in herself”, she can cope with any problem.
This confidence lives in me: only such a woman can cope with any problem; to be strong, you have to force yourself without showing it, and then you can feel sorry for yourself, because "no one understands and sees how hard it all is for me"
Probably, inwardly, I just want to be like her - to be dissatisfied, suffering, irritated, raping, complaining under the guise of "no, no, I can handle everything, only now I will gather my last strength."
When they asked me: "What is most characteristic of you? What qualities? Without what you cannot be imagined as a person?"
Now I would say what these qualities are. This is sentimentality, tenderness, the desire to take care, the desire to be interesting, enthusiastic and captivating; the desire for everything to be “as it should be”; dissatisfaction if things don't go the way I planned; the desire to stupidly stick to the plan; the desire to "do the right thing"; desire to "teach", "share wisdom", "save"; confidence that in order to achieve something, you definitely need to “work”, suffer and deprive yourself of pleasure; dissatisfaction and envy if someone has something that I do not have and that he did not achieve.
I have a great desire to impress with anything: by being well-read, by my good qualities, everything that I have achieved myself, the way I can change and get along with people - rather something intangible, experience, knowledge.
I tend to exaggerate the expression of positive emotions; the desire to save - to buy large packages of something, the desire to buy more products in a cheap store, obsession - an expression of the desire to kill boredom with communication; guilt if I enjoy instead of engaging in "useful activities"; different manifestations of politeness that go off scale in me; the desire to smile back if they smile at me; to listen to what I am not interested in, in the hope that later my uninteresting garbage will be listened to "in exchange", or out of awkwardness, unwillingness to "offend", lose a positive attitude towards me; fear of saying that I'm just not interested in communicating, that the topic is not interesting; the desire to squeeze interest out of oneself during communication, to deceive oneself, to persuade that I am actually interested, although this is not so; helpfulness - attempts to predict the desires of others and fulfill them, fulfilling various requests without analyzing whether I want to do it; assent in conversations.

I want people to perceive me exactly as I am; so that God forbid they don’t think that I’m better than I am, because in the end they will still find out that everything inside is so disturbing and sad.
I am easily influenced. I easily perceive the state of a person who is nearby, it is difficult for me to be angry or sad for a long time if there is a person nearby who suddenly noticed my state and tries to get out of it. I respond to the actions of another person, and usually in a positive way, forgetting minute negative experiences - unless, of course, we are talking about something really serious.
It is best when the situation is discharged in this way, when serious digging deep and showdown does not begin, and attention is shifted to something else. Sometimes, instead of delving into yourself and others, it's easier to do something together, not to talk, but to do.
It seems to me that everything in the world has its place. I believe that there is something like general justice, when the good that you do comes back to you over time. Quite a fabulous perception within the framework of stories about Cinderella and Raccoon, who looked into the pond, for example.
It seems to me that everything you want is possible in the world, you just need to make an effort, understand in which direction you need to move. I am attracted by the American dream - when a person is not chained to his circle, but can move forward, using the potential inherent in him.
I like it when a person knows what he wants, when he is confident in what he is doing.
I think I could make a great secretary: I like the idea that you can help a person who is above you, knows more than you, knows how to manage people, you can plan his day and interact with other people in a way that makes him comfortable do things for more high levels. Especially if my position was called, for example, assistant to the vice president. Only, of course, it is important that a person is really worthy, believing in himself, in his work.
Message from outside world it's not that easy for me. For example, I currently live in an apartment with several strangers. We don’t talk much, and it seems to me that we have very different interests, so I don’t strive to get close to them. Our communication with them doesn’t go further than hello-how are you-well, I usually don’t drink beer in the kitchen with them, because their conversations are of little interest to me; so in fact I live in my own little closed world, shutting myself off from the outside in a computer with headphones.
If I know that there are people around me who understand me, with whom we have a lot in common, I behave differently.
The larger the company, the more difficult. On the one hand, I'm not very good at getting into a conversation, even if I suddenly have something to say: to attract attention a large number people are not very comfortable. On the other hand, the head is busy remembering as much as possible more information, which later is not particularly useful, except for lengthy chaotic entries in the diary about those whom I saw and what impression they made on me and what turned out a little later.
People around me are quite often surprised that I remember what they say. This especially works with those who are very interesting to me - at each moment of time I try to remember as much as possible about them in order to understand them correctly.
It is best to talk alone with a person, because then you are definitely being listened to, because you do not have to make extra effort in order to speak louder or choose a pause in which you can get into with your opinion, you can focus on one person.
It usually follows from this that I can walk in circles in the same place with the person I am talking to and not pay attention to the fact that the area does not change. If I am walking along new streets with someone with whom a conversation of any degree of liveliness has begun, and even more so if the topic is really interesting to me, then I will hardly find later which roads we were walking. On the other hand, if I try to navigate the terrain exclusively on my own, it turns out to be many times better, sometimes even intuitively (really rarely, but still).
I'm greedy. It's hard for me to handle money, I don't know how to spend it. Usually it seems to me that my life is quite arranged without it, I have a certain set of things that I live with, and until they become unusable, I don’t really want to change them. It's hard for me to choose things: go shopping in search of new clothes rather painfully, usually all this goes away with the feeling "I need something, but what I have does not fit at all."
It doesn’t really bother me to live in not very comfortable conditions, if the situation requires it: I can almost equally happily live in a half-killed apartment and a tent, if it doesn’t drag on for a long time. Only with time comes fatigue from some inconvenience, and then you have to somehow focus on what exactly you don’t like, and not be limited to the feeling that “something seems to be wrong.”
I like it when I know exactly how to act. In childhood and adolescence, it was very uncomfortable that too many situations happen to you for the first time, and you do not know exactly what behavior is expected of you, what words and actions. Now you have a certain amount of experience at your disposal, and life has become easier.
Over time, it became easy to accept the fact that despite the fact that each person is quite beautiful in some way, not all of them are interesting to me and not everyone is interested in me, and that this is not because there is something wrong in me. or in them, but simply because that's the way the world works.
At first, I always take up little space - someone told me that this is very introverted: I even like to sit rather on the edge of the chair, straightening up, folding my hands in front of me. In any case, this is how I behaved in interviews, trying to appear in the most advantageous light. It was just the case when it was necessary to seem a little better than I am, and I said the right things, turning reality around the side that looks the most advantageous.
AT ordinary life I don’t do that, it’s more pleasant for me that over time people find out that I’m better than at first glance, than vice versa.
I make a good impression on people, especially those who are older than me.
I don’t have any particular goal, I just look where events lead me and at some main points, at the forks, I think whether this is what I need in order to change direction in time.
On the other hand, I bring to the end those things about which I think it is necessary. Here I focus on the arguments of reason, and not on any emotional experiences.
It's usually easy for me to wait. Cause I'm postponing everything for last moment, I usually know very clearly when this last moment is, and very rarely, when I miss a deadline, I rather meet the deadlines. At the institute, I could wait for hours for a teacher to come who needs to finish the tails. Or sitting in this endless line at the doctor's office - no problem at all. Another thing is that when the moment comes, and my turn comes, I become anxious; when the moment comes to act, I really want to do nothing.
AT important things I am static, it is difficult for me to decide to change my life, to move somewhere, at first I calculate a thousand times what benefits and possible failures this brings.
The easiest way to go somewhere is if there is no time to think when they call you and say: "Let's meet in an hour." If the meeting is scheduled in advance, there are a thousand internal causes to not go anywhere, a thousand excuses that you have to hastily get rid of.
People often complain that they do not have enough time to do what they are interested in. I have rather the opposite situation: I have plenty of time, and I do not always know what to do with it.
I often have to wait for the right moment. It’s hard for me to influence the situation myself, many things seem completely beyond any influence from the outside, so I just wait until external influences balance themselves in such a way that the action is timely.
It is important for me to be useful, to do something so that people can appreciate my hard work and disinterestedness, which deep inside does not wither with disinterestedness. I change my actions to the attitude of people towards me, it seems to me that if I am useful, if I am kind and sweet, the world will respond in the same way, take care of me.

If I came up with something for myself, then I can be quite purposeful, go through my problems and complexes, through my shyness and embarrassment to a happy nowhere, based on my own ghostly ideas that everything will be fine.
The easiest way is to go with the flow, relying on relatives who are always there, who are ready to protect and take care of. But at some point it is clear that you need to do something yourself if you want to come to something really interesting. This understanding is like a breath of courage, which in ordinary life, it seems, is not so much. This is the result of a well-considered decision, weighing the pros and cons of life now and that interesting life, which may be about to begin if you know what exactly needs to be changed. It takes quite a lot of energy to fight with oneself, the choice of what is more expensive is not very satisfactory stability or new experience and a brave new world.
My life is made up of small feats that, on closer inspection, do not seem to be anything really special, but are of great importance to me.
I can be strong if, contrary to the normal course of events, my plans are violated.
Once I needed to get a passport in the shortest possible time, and in the prescribed thirty calendar days the miracle did not happen. The Internet prompted me that in such cases it is necessary to write three letters and sue. I called several superiors and confidently explained to them exactly what I would do if my passport was not with me as soon as possible, and received it four days later.
I don’t know how to put pressure and show aggression, instead I can be collected and logical, I can have a logical plan of action with calculated options for the development of events.
If I come up with some kind of goal, then I can go towards it if there is a clear plan in my head. Any big event, which changes lives, can be broken into small fragments, and if you implement them one by one, in the end you can come exactly where you went for a long time; I have always liked the saying “the eyes are afraid, but the hands are doing”, if you really put effort into something, then it cannot have at least some effect.
I'm good at adapting. People like me and I can use it.
I listen and memorize what they tell me so that I can take it all to myself, to a safe place and think it over for myself. I am trusting, and you can tell me any fables, and if I am face to face with the person who tells me this, I am ready to believe. But the delol is not limited to absorbing information -
I may have an opinion that differs from the one that they tell me, and I have no desire to immediately dissuade a person that he is wrong, and my opinion is the only correct one. I listen, I take in information, I look at the situation through the eyes of the person I am talking to, I evaluate how thoughtful my arguments are compared to what is being offered to me. I collect information for later use.
I rarely enter into open confrontation, very often it seems useless to me.
There is a lot of hypocrisy in me, I can nod at what they say to me, and in my head to disagree - it's not even that I'm afraid to enter into an argument, no; perhaps I'm just interested in the opinion of the opposite side and other justifications; perhaps I decided for myself that it was inappropriate to argue, that they would not hear me, and I was not wasting extra energy. In fact, I am interested in the lives of people who I like, who are dear to me, what happens to others, I don’t really care.
I'm not lying - this requires imagination and a good memory for what you say; I'm more likely to keep quiet, the result is about the same.
I like it when they appreciate me and know that I am not as simple as I seem at first glance, but this applies to the circle of people that I am interested in; in relation to other people, I am satisfied with the situation when I am somewhat underestimated.
If something doesn’t work right away, I get upset for a while - perhaps not enough time has passed, and soon you can try again, the main thing is to wait for the right moment and make sure that you are still interested.
I do not lose control over myself in the generally accepted sense, I am able, under negative external influences, to bring myself to a semi-inadequate state, I can scream, breaking my voice, throw things, get angry in every possible way, but this is a mask, a behavior model that I partly adopted. Before you throw such a scandal, before you decide on some kind of forceful stupidity (for example, throwing a glass of water in your face, so unnatural, or throwing something really heavy at someone who pisses you off), there is a fraction of a second when you choose to stop or allow yourself to misbehave. For a while I chose the second option, and then I realized how unworthy it is, how stupid and disgusting it looks: to be able to restrain emotions and not do it.
I can contain any anger and aggression in myself; I don't yell at the person who yells at me; I can stop myself, realizing the unreasonable response in the same spirit. I know that it doesn’t suit me to be angry and aggressive, I don’t know how to “swing rights”, raising my voice and breaking into a scream, this is just not my method.
For quite a long time, I talked with the children and learned a simple thing: it is much more reasonable to leave the room for a minute to take a deep breath and thereby throw out anger out of myself, and return in a familiar, calm state than to pointlessly splash out energy.
My strength is not in responding like to like, but in common sense, in the ability to bring the right arguments at the right time, and if I'm lucky, this has a much greater effect.
I know how to conserve resources, not to waste; I can look calm and benevolent, smile a lot, even if just the previous evening I was suffocating from internal experiences (which, no, no, and come in fits); I am balanced and stable, I can handle a lot. I have no desire to shift decision-making onto other people's shoulders, my problems onto someone else, responsibility for my life onto someone else - I am completely independent, I can not ask for anyone's help, I have enough of what I already have .
I don't really understand exactly what I am, which is probably why I drag myself into those situations that are beyond comfort to see what happens, if I can cope with the changed conditions, something like manipulation, but within themselves, experiments on themselves. I'm looking for where my place is.
It annoys me when they begin to give me advice until the moment when I really need it: again, voiced consent (if it is not expressed in some clear wording) does not always mean internal consent, and I feel that I have the right to do according to - to his own.
Once I was in love with the wrong person, and at the moment when I myself doubted whether I wanted to continue to stay with him, the family said their weighty word against it, and the story dragged on for a couple of months. Such a step on the part of relatives was perceived by me as an attempt to pressure, which is unacceptable even on the part of relatives, because it causes a response. I then spoke a lot in vain, not quite believing in what I was saying, most likely precisely in order to oppose myself to pressure. As a result, it was quite difficult to figure out how logical my behavior is, and what I really want if I get rid of this childish "do it out of spite."

"Dostoevsky" (type) socionics identifies as an ethical-intuitive introvert. Briefly, a person with such signs can be described as follows: his consciousness is directed inward, along the time axis he is not “here and now”, but seems to be hovering somewhere.

Solving problems that have arisen, he relies on his emotions and is not very prone to mood swings. Some researchers use the pseudonym "Cinderella" for the representatives of the weaker sex of this type.

Socionics. "Dostoevsky": appearance

A woman of this type, despite the absence of excessive extravagance, still looks elegant, dressed with taste. She looks after her image important element whom he considers branded clothes, feels more confident in it. As a rule, Cinderella looks younger than she really is. The movements are well coordinated. Even more recognizable is the "Dostoevsky" man. Socionics provides a guideline that allows you to unmistakably distinguish this psychotype from the rest. This is a completely impassive face with features characteristic of the martyrs depicted on the icons: a straight, elongated nose, a regular oval. A modest smile is the maximum positive emotion that he is able to show. The figure is ascetic, thin.

Socionics. "Dostoevsky": manner of communication

A person of this type at first only observes people, studies what relations have developed between them, and then already comes into contact. He never shows initiative. He absolutely does not know how to be cunning, hypocritical, adapt to the current situation, play a role. If Dostoevsky has stronger ethics than intuition, he becomes touchy and harsh. Somehow it happens by itself that people pour out their souls in front of him, asking for advice. And "Dostoevsky" never repels them, even to the detriment of personal time. And if he cannot help with deed, then at least he will suggest a way out of the situation. Impartially, objectively, he will consider the problem from all sides and offer the best option.

Socionics. "Dostoevsky": features of behavior

The constant readiness to help loved ones who are in a difficult situation is a reliable sign for determining this type. And this is manifested not only in words, but also in deeds. He is especially good at bringing people together. He is always between the warring parties and with each of them is in good relations. He is not able to be aggressive, scream, exert volitional pressure on people. "Dostoevsky" punishes with complete disregard, which continues until the offender apologizes. "Dostoevsky" conscientiously and carefully performs both assigned work and homework. This type does not like any impromptu, prefers to plan everything in advance and follow the intended path.

The real problem for this person is the lack of initiative and determination, the inability to demand something for oneself. Of course, congenital timidity and shyness contribute to this. "Dostoevsky" does not respond to the insult, conceals it in himself, believing that the person who inflicted it will sooner or later understand everything, repent and, perhaps, even apologize. But he needs to understand that this happens extremely rarely, so he needs to learn how to protect himself, express his opinion and say no.