By our sin, we give the devil rights over us. Self-will Asking a priest the sin of self-will

About spirituality and priesthood

Is it necessary to take a blessing from all the priests in a row, or is it enough to take from one?

Depending on the circumstances, how best to do it.

What to do if you have lost confidence in your confessor, but you are embarrassed to say so?

Tell another confessor about it.

There are such sins (especially some of the flesh) that it is very shameful to speak in confession, especially if a woman has to speak to a young priest. What to do in such cases (especially if these sins are heavy and cannot be forgiven at a general confession)?

Find another priest who will repent of these sins.

If the priest blesses to do something that does not agree with the teachings of the church, is it necessary to fulfill the blessing?

Not only a priest, but even an angel from heaven should not be listened to if he speaks contrary to the teaching of the Gospel. The holy apostle writes about this in his epistle.

Can one priest serve two Liturgies on the same day?

In the Orthodox Church, this is forbidden to a priest. In the life of St. Joasaph of Belgorod we read that one priest could not die because of this sin, and only when he repented to St. Joasaph and he allowed him, he was able to die.

If the priest is not very experienced and is probably doing something wrong, then should he tell about it or not?

It is better to abstain, as Saint Barsanuphius the Great advises. You can tell a close father with love.

If the priest did not allow communion without explaining the reasons, is it possible to turn with the confession that has just been said for a blessing to another priest?

It is better to be patient, contritely recognizing oneself as unworthy, than to turn to another priest.

Is it possible to complain to a priest about a neighbor at confession, ask him to reason with her husband and, in general, tell about her everyday troubles?

In view of the very “compressed time”, only sins should be spoken to the priest at confession. The rest is better to say later.

I know that one of the priests I know leads an unworthy lifestyle. Is it worth it to take communion when he serves the Liturgy, or is it better to postpone? The same applies to the consecration of water and other sacred rites.

St. John Chrysostom says that grace also works through unworthy priests.

How to properly address a deacon: just like a priest, i.e. "Father Vasily", or "Father Deacon", "Deacon Vasily"?

It doesn't play a big role. If only to seek in a conversation with him how best to save your soul and overcome your evil, sinful habits, in order to ask spiritual things that are useful for the soul, otherwise it may happen as Elder Anthony of Optina said: “If you ask unprofitable, you will hear unprofitable.”

If the confessor died and did not have time to transfer the child to another confessor, then what to do?

This question is kind of weird. It is not the confessor who chooses his children, but the children choose their confessor. The most important thing is to choose a confessor for yourself, so that he is experienced in the spiritual life, and now almost everyone is looking for clairvoyant and saints.

If a clergyman commits sins, and then goes to the church to serve, does he offend the rank and the Holy Church itself with his presence?

Here it is necessary to say that sin is different from sin. In one of the prayers for the dead, the priest reads that “there is no person who would live and not sin” ... God alone is without sin, but there are sins that, indeed, not only discredit the dignity of the priest, but according to canonical rules, if the priest commits such sins, he should be defrocked. This, first of all, includes mortal sins: fornication, adultery, all kinds of sexual perversions, witchcraft, murder. If a priest is subject to this, he not only perishes himself, but, the worst thing, is a temptation for unbelieving or completely unbelieving people. It must be said that if such a priest, for some reason, is not prohibited by the ruling bishop from serving, the Sacraments of the Church that he performs are valid and effective. The grace of God, bestowed on him at his ordination to the rank, acts on the believer regardless of the sinfulness of the clergyman, passing through him as through a "pipe". Although the demand for sins from the Lord is strict from any Christian, but he who is invested with dignity will answer for them purely. To whom much is given, much will be required (Luke 12:48).

Father, many people say that now there are no elders and there is no person who would interpret Holy Scripture?

Seek and you shall find; search hard. If a person diligently prays to the Lord God, then after that every little boy will say to him for the benefit of his soul. And the fact that others would like to find a leader, but do not find it, is said by those who do not want to put up with it. Moreover, the enemy of the human race, who always wants our destruction, hinders; he knows that if someone with humility seeks advice from a person experienced in the spiritual life, then this one will explain to the questioner and reveal the deceit of the enemy.

How to address a bishop: simply “Vladyko” or with the addition of a name, like a priest: “Vladyko Boris”?

The traditional address to the bishop is “holy Vladyko” or simply “Vladyko”, without pronouncing the name.

How to look for the leader of the spiritual life in our time?

For the last times, the later St. The Fathers are already more offering guidance from the Holy Scriptures and the writings of the Fathers, without rejecting, however, the very cautious advice with modern fathers and brothers, while carefully maintaining in thoughts and feelings the spirit of humility and repentance. “This is doing,” writes St. Ignatius Brianchaninov, - given by God to our time, and we are obliged to reverently use the gift of God, given to us for salvation.

Why is so much importance given to St. fathers of life under the guidance of a spiritual father?

Whoever lives by himself, without a spiritual father, lives fruitlessly. Let him do well, but in this case his conscience cannot be peaceful (since it is pacified by confession and revelation). He must have constant indecisiveness, vagueness, and most importantly, the mood of self-will remains the same.

What if there is no leader?

“N. tells the truth that there are no real leaders now,” St. Theophan the Recluse answered a similar question. - However, one should not remain with one Scripture and fatherly lessons. A question is needed! Paisiy Nyametsky decided this: two or three like-minded people will make an alliance and question each other, leading a life in mutual obedience with the fear of God and prayer.

How better to ask the elders, one or many?

You should never ask different leaders about the same matter, and never ask the same question again, because the very first answer comes from the Lord, and the second from the reasoning of a man in an elder. Anyone who asks takes upon himself the sign of humility and thereby imitates Christ. Saint Peter of Damascus says about himself: "I have received much harm from inexperienced advisers." Therefore, it is very good to ask about everything, but experienced, and inexperienced - it is dangerous, because they do not have reasoning.

When should one leave the elder?

The Monk Pimen the Great commanded to be immediately separated from the old man, bringing harm to the soul. It’s a different matter when there is no spiritual harm, but only thoughts that confuse, from a demon, which do not need to be obeyed as acting. exactly where we receive spiritual benefit.

Is it possible to seek priesthood or monasticism?

“It is a sin to strive for priesthood, but it is commendable to strive for monasticism - and St. the fathers sought monasticism, and even shied away from the priesthood,” teaches Elder Barnabas of Iberia.

Does the prohibition of a bishop entail the deprivation of grace, which is not in accordance with the will of God?

Only that prohibition of the bishop entails the deprivation of grace, which is in accordance with the will of God. If there is no such consent, then not only is grace not taken away and not sent, but Church life itself shows that all such actions are not accepted by the Church, even if they were performed by the great Ecumenical Councils and the most Orthodox Patriarchs and Synods.

What if the priest refused to listen to the confession?

“If your confessor refuses to listen to your confession, then you can turn to another” (St. Theophan the Recluse).

Why do some believers sometimes slip jealousy, envy, if you often turn to a priest?

“This happens when we stop a lot, often without giving an account ourselves, only on the personality of the shepherd; his image is always presented before us, our heart is overflowing with feeling for him as for a person, but Christ, our Savior, remains, as it were, on the sidelines. It is then that jealousy, envy, rivalry, and hostility develop among the flock. Then the following phenomena are also possible. The beloved shepherd has died, and we imagine that all is lost. Where is Christ? Did you have him? Unfortunately no. If He had been, then such cowardice and disappointment would not have happened to you ”(Archbishop Arseniy Zhadanovsky).

What to do if there is an unkind feeling towards the confessor?

“When you are ministered to by a confessor or an elder, you may have bad feelings for him: suspicions, condemnations, envy and ill will. Do not succumb, however, to these feelings, fight them and do not leave your confessor or elder. If you have a bad feeling towards your confessor, know that the latter is useful to you, but now the enemy has planned to remove you from him, to remove you. Maybe the elder knocks down your proud feeling or some other shortcoming, but this is unpleasant for you and the enemy, and hostility to your spiritual father rises in your heart ”(Archbishop Arseniy Zhadanovsky).

Should the priest himself retire?

Saint Theophan the Recluse did not advise to retire. “Until the Lord straightens out,” he said, “pull.”

What should I do if I have not found a confessor who is knowledgeable, experienced and well-intentioned?

Yes, indeed, a satisfactory spiritual mentor in our times is the greatest rarity. In this case, confess your sins to your spiritual father more often, and draw instructions from the Holy Scriptures and books written by St. fathers and elders, especially about asceticism.

Before confession, read the commandments of God with an explanation or a list of sins.

Isn't it a sin to "choose" priests?

Honor all the priests, resort to the good ones. More parents need to honor priests. “Do you know,” asks St. John Chrysostom, “who is a priest?” And he answers: “The angel of the Lord. And therefore, it is necessary to honor pastors, he says, more than parents, for they are the servants of Christ on earth, and whoever honors them honors Christ. Appreciate wise, kind and experienced shepherds in spiritual life and keep them close to you.

Any priest can resolve sins, but one of many can teach spiritual life.

What is heartbreak?

Some of their believers manage to have several confessors in such a way that they say some sins to one and others to another, there are also those who do not value the confessor, but try to sort through them as much as possible, justifying themselves by saying that they will not fall for good. All this is the fruit of inner cordial licentiousness.

How to look at the change of confessors?

The general rule should be this: without a good reason, one should not change the confessor. And what can be called a good reason? The change of residence of the shepherd and through this difficult communication with him is an incurable disease of the shepherd.

In what order should thoughts be revealed to the spiritual father?

The more important thoughts should be opened to the spiritual father first, and not vice versa.

Are secret deeds useful without the knowledge of the spiritual father?

Here is what St. Ambrose of Optina writes to one ascetic: “Write me sincerely your secret asceticism, for which you did not accept blessings, and unauthorized asceticism is both dangerous and soul-damaging. If this is good, then why is it hidden from the spiritual father?

Look - you have one soul and one mind; it is dangerous to damage both; and enemy plantings are everywhere, of course, under the guise of goodness and spiritual benefit. I see that you have fallen into the net of seeking perfection, forgetting the perfection of repentance?”

At what age can you ordain?

“Before the age of twenty, they cannot be admitted to the priesthood,” answers Metropolitan Philaret of Moscow, “and therefore let them study more maturely than, out of immature education, they will wait for the time of service without work and without supervision.”

I can’t reveal some sins to my confessor in any way and even confessed them to another priest. Is it possible from a spiritual point of view?

Whoever confesses to another priest, ashamed to reveal a great sin to his confessor, is like the murderer of Christ, and his sin will be inscribed over his head in the future life.

How to behave when meeting with a priest?

When meeting with a priest, bow to him and rejoice, as if you saw your Angel on earth. The enemy puts in his superstitious thought that now there will be no happiness; but if you really think so, you will be punished for your thought. Think about it: if a priest goes to commune a person, then he has the Body and Blood of Christ with him... There used to be apostles, but now they are being replaced by priests.

Selfishness, willfulness, willfulness

There is in man three very strong reasons with which his fallen nature opposes the assimilation of the disposition of Christ. First of them - enslaves his mind, it self-conceit and self-conceit ; second - enslaves his heart, it waywardness ; and third- enslaves his will, it willfulness . All three make up the fallen disposition of a person, they together are his bad temper, i.e. lack of the disposition of God. Ignorance is the abomination of desolation. We often use the word "abomination of desolation" to look for what is outside... This is how it most often happens. Churches that have strayed into heresy, towns and villages without churches, live in an abomination of desolation. But the human soul, which is all turned into these three self-pleasing proud foundations, is also in the abomination of desolation.

Let's focus on these three. The first foundation is that which enslaves the human mind - conceit. Every person has plenty of it. Some have an opinion about themselves as a person who is quite good, well-behaved, kind, capable, developed, highly educated. For example, one says: "I am an educated person." Why? - "I have a high school diploma." Another says: “I am also an educated person, although I am lower than you, because I have a matriculation certificate for high school, but I graduated from it with “4” and “5”. And the other says: “But I graduated with a silver medal.” , and the third says: "And I'm on the gold." At this moment, they show conceit, because a person chooses for himself the criterion by which he evaluates himself and through this he claims a certain attitude of people towards himself.

Saint Theophan the Recluse considers in the book "The Path to Salvation" such self opinion: "I am a Christian." And this self-conceit "gives" him the right now to go to church without fail. Is there a blessing from God for this? But a person does not delve into the Providences of God, does not hear the will of God. He has an conceit that Christianity is better than non-Christianity. And he considers it his duty to church everyone - sorcerers, Baptists, atheists, all his neighbors and relatives, being guided only by his conceit. In self-conceit, a person does not surrender into the hands of God, is not guided by the will of God, it is not it that constitutes the value of his life. value in his life he himself

.

Another reason is self-imposed- it means to have your opinion to everything and everything around. This is an extremely serious disease of the human mind. Let's try to get to the bottom of this and understand how but its heaviness lies.

A believer needs a meeting with the temper of Christ. The greatest possible encounter with Christ for every Christian is the encounter in the Sacraments. Often we have no other personal relationship with the Lord. After all, now the Lord does not bodily abide among us, and therefore we cannot meet Him with our own eyes, since we meet each other every day. How can we know the character of Christ? There are only three sources: the Sacraments, where the Lord gives His grace, the Word of God, the Gospel, as well as the works of the Holy Fathers, revealing its content. The Holy Fathers revealed to us in their creations the image of Christ. We can learn the image of Christ's disposition only with the help of the Gospel and patristic writings.

self-doubt- this is the ability of a person to make his immediate (or after some labor) judgment about this or that phenomenon, thing or event about everything. Let's imagine how the gospel meets not the thirst for the disposition of God, but human self-will. In this case, a person makes his own, personal opinion about what he read. For example, he reads the Commandment of God: " Blessed are the poor in spirit". And he comes to a stupor. Self-esteem has nothing to rely on. Many remember, probably, the first meeting with this commandment ... Some kind of complete mystery in this Commandment, it is completely unknown what it says ... Gradually reading patristic interpretations , a person slowly, slowly begins to contain the content of this commandment. And from some moment, it seems to him, he clearly understands what it is. And he says: "Now I understand the Commandment of God." Alas, from the moment he said "understood," and the triumph of his self-confidence began. enlightened, a understood. These two words have different meanings.

The word "understood" means "to take", to seize, to possess. Thus the proud human mind, remaining outside of God, tries to embrace the world around it. But the human mind is limited. Neither the depth, nor the height, nor the breadth, nor the longitude of the world, micro and macrocosm, he can really embrace. Then human pride goes the other way. She makes her judgment about depth or height, about latitude or longitude, about quality or property, about character or mood. This judgment is given a finished form and is satisfied with that, believing that there is nothing more in the object or event or phenomenon.

Indeed, in the material world, all objects have a finished look. This kind can be described, repeated. Take a rock, or a tree, or a table. The external image is complete, and the cause of the image, as well as the cause of the substance from which the object is made, can go into an incomprehensible depth. About this depth, a person makes a certain judgment, which at first is a hypothesis, assumption or opinion. The more a person separates himself from himself and gives place to the object or phenomenon itself with its objective properties and various manifestations, the closer his judgment is to the object and phenomenon itself, and so it continues until it completely coincides with it. But from that moment on, there is no longer a human judgment about the object; the very reality of the object remains for human contemplation. The ability to humble oneself before the reality of an object, which means to refrain from one's own opinion or judgments about an object, is a feature of pure contemplation, which is assimilated to the human mind by God.

Alas, the sinful obscuration of the mind, its falling into pride and submission to it, doomed a person to go in his scientific search not by pure contemplation, but by the method of gradual judgments and testing them in practice or experience. The more a person is seized by pride, the more petty his judgments. He does not bother to look into the depths. Having barely grasped the external manifestations of an object, he already forms his own opinion about it and, quite content, relies on it in his handling of it. Thus, blindfolded sages gave quite confident and highly intelligent descriptions of an elephant, one on its leg, another on its trunk, and a third on its tail. Or historians and writers of different persuasions and levels give their own description of the same historical events. All the rumors that people love to live on are based on this. According to the same mechanism, there are many quarrels and mutual distorted or incorrect understanding of each other by people. From this is born a multitude of wise interpretations of the Gospel, which become the cause of numerous sects.

Pure contemplation is characteristic only of a humble mind, and the depth and simplicity of contemplation is characteristic only of the Spirit of God.

Hence, outstanding discoveries in science could be made by people who were quite humble and simple, or at that period of their lives when simplicity was characteristic of them.

Now back to our two words. The word "understood" refers either to a reality that has a truly complete appearance, or to a judgment of a person, to which he himself, in spite of the subject, gives the property of completeness. The last one is self-reflection.

The words "understand", "understand", "understanding" do not refer to the completeness of any level of an object or phenomenon, but to its depth, which, regarding divine objects, always remains infinite, incomprehensible.

In this case, the derivative of "understood" the word " understand"means to take, grab, assimilate, master any knowledge. "Understood" means that the subject is no longer subject to my further research, study. "Understood" means took possession, ownership. reason can take possession of the earth, the universe, the atom, and even God as a concept. But neither the Holy Scriptures nor God can man own. No matter how much he restricts his understanding of the Gospel, it will remain incomprehensible to him. Therefore, the Church about spiritual phenomena and about Truth speaks as subject understanding, i.e., infinite, unlimited comprehension. The understanding consciousness is put aside from egoism, pride, humbles itself before the greatness of Divine truth, and from this humility works on its understanding. In an attempt to comprehend, a person performs three successive stages. The first is the assimilation of heard or read knowledge. The second is reflection, spiritual reasoning over them. When thinking, we draw on the same subject the judgments of other holy fathers, with their spiritual understanding we peer into the same subject. The third is the test of life, the test, the fulfillment in life. A soul filled with humility acquires grace-filled sanctification and, thanks to this, begins to have a spiritual understanding about this or that subject.

Conceptual consciousness usually stops at the first stage and is satisfied with it. Moreover, it assumes that the object is really what is contained in the concept of it. Here is the beginning of arrogance, self-confidence, self-satisfaction, while understanding is born in humility and is accomplished in its development, deepening or ascent to God. Conceptual consciousness will say "I understood". The sensible will say "I got it".

In the patristic writings of past centuries, we will not encounter the word "understood", "understand". There are also the words "understand", "understand" - it means to constantly meet with the truth of the Lord, but never comprehend it to the end, not reach the peak, all understanding. For the truths of God are infinite. The conceptual consciousness of a person is his own consciousness, it forms its own opinion about everything, its own concept. Having received this concept, having formed it, he takes pride in himself, is proud of it.

It knows no depth in anything, but it has its own opinion about everything. It can look at everything simply, but it will be either the simplicity of unbelief, or the simplicity of passion. And according to both, a person can be frank, sometimes to the point of insolence, and this will be the whole secret of his simplicity.

Here is what St. Macarius the Great says about such consciousness: “Those who proclaim the spiritual teaching without having tasted and experienced it, I reckon like a man walking on a hot summer afternoon through an empty and waterless country; sweet and transparent water, and as if he drinks from it without any obstacle to his fill, or to a man who has not tasted honey in the least, but tries to explain to others what its sweetness is. what belongs to perfection, sanctification and passionlessness, they want to instruct others in this, for if God grants them even a little feeling of what they are talking about, then they will certainly know that the truth and the deed do not resemble their story, but very much very different from him"(Letter on the rise of the mind, ch. 18).

In this sense, self-righteousness is one of the most difficult enemies of today's churching of a person. A modern person is really almost incapable of gaining the disposition of Christ or starting the path of this acquisition until he comprehends and discovers his own self. To understand one's own mind is to form one more opinion, and to comprehend it in oneself is to make a victory over oneself, to advance towards spiritual life, to experience repentance. The stages of understanding are described by St. Theophan the Recluse in his book "What is spiritual life and how to tune in to it." Until a person passes through these five stages, the understanding of the word of the Gospel or the Holy Fathers cannot be completed in him. This is a serious, life-performing spiritual work on the content of one's mind.

The second stone in the heart is willfulness. Willfulness strikes a person to the very depths of the soul, first of all it manifests itself in the nature of his relations with others. waywardness- this is the ability to sustainably maintain a certain order, a certain nature of the relationship to the environment. And in certain situations, behave in the same way.

Usually we distinguish all people by waywardness. At the everyday level, it looks like this: “Katerina Vasilievna always becomes furious in such a situation”, “Gennady Ivanovich is always very offended”, “Helen always becomes stubborn in these cases”, “Nikolai in this situation always falls into hysterics, throws things , slams the door and runs away "... Someone is always arrogant in relations with certain people, with others - he always experiences disgust (people are always disgusting and disgusting for him), in relation to others - he is always a little condescending. A certain person is always a servant in relation to certain people, another is like a frog in front of a boa constrictor, one is stubborn, another is suspicious, the third is boastful. Persistence, perseverance in one's character is the willfulness, the stable disposition of the soul that a person shows in certain situations. And most often, self-will is not realized by the person himself. And even where he begins to realize this in himself, the depths of self-will are inaccessible to him. In fact, to change the waywardness in certain situations, i.e. to control himself, for most people for a long period of their announcement is almost impossible.

There are times when a person works hard to change his relationship with the people around him. Suppose a person is closed. As soon as he enters the society of people, something immediately closes in him, and he cannot overcome this in himself, he did this and that, he confessed many times, repented of this, tried to change something, to change. But as soon as he got into a characteristic situation, everything returned to normal in him.

Man's willfulness is uncontrollable. If we look even deeper, we see that self-will lies at the foundation of man's fallen character. Only the sanctifying grace of God can fully reveal human willfulness.

When we turn to modern psychology, which has great achievements (especially Western), we will see that it is actually engaged in the study of the willfulness of man, i.e. she does not go beyond self-will in her research. A lot in this area has been researched, a lot has been studied, the deepest mechanisms of the formation and action of self-will have been discovered, and many psychological techniques are based on them, with which psychotherapy successfully helps people. But until some point. And then psychotherapy can no longer help a person. Even such outstanding methods, which are based on the research of the Nobel laureate American scientist Eric Berne and his school, give results for only three to five years. And then a person still faces his waywardness, which emerges from the depths, and which, again, he cannot control. This depth of a person's subconsciousness (and the very depth of human willfulness lies in the subconsciousness) cannot be revealed by anything except by the action of God's grace.

The Lord, when he calls a person to the Church, calls him to begin to discover himself. This is what happens with the help of God. In some cases, the Lord carefully, and in others, crushingly (but always curatively, accurately) reveals to a person his waywardness, and through this fall to the sanctifying grace of God, a person begins to be healed by repentance from him.

Finally, the third stone is willfulness. We will not dwell on this in detail. Much has been said about this above.

It is the fulfillment by a person of the needs of either self-pleasing, or man-pleasing, or complacency (self-confidence, pride-self-sufficiency). In any case, there is some self-interest behind the self-will. Otherwise, there is no need for a person to go against the will of God, there is no need to ignore it, not to notice it, or to remake it, to interpret it in one's own way.

Self-will forbids reverence in man, for it honors only itself. It does not know obedience, for it forbids faith, stifles it, mortifies it with petrification, so that in time a person completely ceases to hear God. Self-will, driven by pride, in its daring antics, openly challenged God.

Willfulness is afraid of sincere, trusting relationships, does everything as it wants, wants guarantees, doubts circumstances, upcoming events, does not trust people, is afraid to betray itself to the will of mentors, confessors, leaves the last word and choice for itself, tries on for a long time or, on the contrary, acts thoughtlessly and resolutely, hopes for himself or, on the contrary, doubts himself, hesitates in indecision.

Thus three characteristics of man's fallen nature cast him off in a powerful way from Christ. And if it were not for the grace of God, it would be impossible for a person to be saved from them.

There is a certain segment of people who are not averse to visiting the temple, from time to time to go to confession and take communion (say, once a year), but at the same time believe that:

1. Biblical commandments and church rules of piety are difficult to fulfill, especially for a modern person;
2. These commandments deprive a person of the joys of earthly life, and sometimes contradict the very nature of man;

It is characteristic that this opinion is usually expressed when it is necessary to justify “free” sexual relations “without a stamp” in front of a priest at confession, then non-observance of fasts, the absence of a home prayer rule, etc.

If you look at the commandments as a set of rules given for the purpose of moral education, the above statements may well be a topic for discussion. But the fact of the matter is that these commandments are based on a certain understanding of the nature of man and the purpose of his life. That is, they cannot be understood in isolation from Christian anthropology.

So. I dare say that the 10 biblical commandments, the Sermon on the Mount of the Savior, and so on. - limiting our self-will, enable a person to gain freedom.

Imagine a driver behind the wheel. On the way, he meets various signs and indicators - speed limits, a ban on turning, etc. There are also traffic rules. You may decide that there are too many of them - try to observe all this! “But I’m late for a business meeting! ..”; “I have a meeting with a girl! ..”; “The guys are already calling: the bathhouse has been heated, the moonshine from Belovezhskaya Pushcha has been brought in, the shish kebab is “ripe” - I’m late! ..” And in general, what Russian does not like fast driving ( especially if in the blood - 0.1 or more ppm)!

What do you think will happen to this driver? Perhaps a few times "carry". But, sooner or later, an accident can be guaranteed. And instead of a destination, a person ends up in a ditch, or even in intensive care. Neither there nor there - there is no freedom.

This is self-will - the desire to "steer" according to one's own concepts, regardless of the accumulated experience of others, which is embodied in the rules and road signs.

These rules are likely to be imperfect. But they create quite a sufficient level of safety on the roads. And if I go, observing them - then freely I achieve my goal - say, the city of Minsk, and in it - my entrance and apartment.

That., freedom is the conscious acceptance of the rules and restrictions necessary to achieve a goal.

For a Christian, the goal of life is to become a temple of the Holy Spirit, to reach the Kingdom of Christ. But, since for many this sounds too high, I will put it simply. Perhaps we all want to learn how to be happy.

On the way to achieve this goal, there are also rules of motion. For a Christian, they are expressed in the New Testament. There are also psychological, social rules for building family relationships, behavior in society. There are rules for building healthy relationships in a work team. Etc.

I may not accept them. I can't even bother to get to know them properly. And in general, God is Love, He must forgive me my mistakes! And I didn’t rob or kill, I live more or less like a decent person (according to my own system of values, of course). So, I am simply obliged to be accepted into paradise ... As for the family - I love this girl (guy) - and love itself will teach you everything! Therefore, we do not need psychology!

Only, like the rules of the road, spiritual, family and social laws apply regardless of whether I know and accept them. Therefore, if I have Indeed there is a goal- to become happy - to ignore these commandments is simply unreasonable. Otherwise, you should not be surprised later why I am “in a ditch” - still here on earth, when “tear” and depression become constant companions. And for some reason it’s scary to stand before the Lord in eternity ...

But there is another interesting question - do I generally choose the right goals to achieve? Will they really give me the expected fullness of being and happiness? Here, drunk suddenly comes to mind somewhere for some reason to go. He is completely convinced of the importance of this trip, and knows exactly its purpose. He gets behind the wheel - and goes - if there is no one to stop him in time. And having sobered up (sometimes - already in handcuffs) - he himself does not understand or does not remember what thoughts he was guided by ...

It happens in life too. A person sets a goal for himself to create a family - only after creation he sees that the goal was chosen prematurely, he is not ready for marriage. And the family, if not falling apart, then "bursting at the seams." Or - the goal was chosen from false motives (“jumping out to get married” to escape from a dysfunctional parental family; confusing pity for a man with love; they see a housewife and a body for sexual intimacy in a spouse, etc.). Or - it was expected that with career growth there would be satisfaction with life. And after reaching the desired fast, a void opened up in the soul, and the difficulties associated with fasting turned out to be a burden.

How correctly defined is my global goal of life, which will be the dominant, and from which my actions and deeds will follow?

And here we come to the topic of sin.

Sin is not just a transgression of the commandments, not only “irritated, overeating, lazy to pray,” as it usually sounds in a standard confession. At depth, sin is the choice of purpose and path. It will be easier for me to convey the meaning of sin by drawing a parallel with addictions. There is a saying in the literature of Alcoholics Anonymous that alcoholism is the ultimate rebellion of self-will. In my opinion, alcoholism and other psychoactive addictions are the most vivid manifestation of being infected with sin, creating idols from ourselves and from the world, striving to become a god without God. In sin, I'm looking for heaven for myself - the way I want it to be. When I commit a sin, I am engaged in self-affirmation.

Sin is choosing a goal other than God, outside of God, without God.

There is such a thing - the constitution of the body. This is a set of initial parameters, laws, functions inherent in this body, within which the organism develops and lives. But it cannot go beyond the constitution. For example, I can't change my hair from black to brown (dyeing my hair doesn't count). A sanguine person can learn to control his behavior and feelings, but he is unlikely to become a phlegmatic person. Taking hormonal drugs to accelerate growth or increase the length of the legs - in addition to doubtful effect, is likely to harm health. Attempts to go beyond the limits of one's psycho-physical constitution threaten with destruction.

There is also a spiritual constitution. According to the Bible, man was originally created with certain parameters and tasks, which are described in the Bible as follows: "and God created man in His own image and likeness." The image of God in man is his constitution. Similarity, i.e., the ability to become like the Creator, to draw closer to Him, is his goal. It was natural for him to strive for his Prototype, to reveal and develop the gifted abilities, ultimately turning his life into communion with God. And while he walked along this path, observing the rules - the commandments given in paradise and the restriction (not to eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil) - he was free.

But people wanted to be gods - without God. They wanted to manage their own lives, to find the purpose and meaning of life outside their Prototype, subdue peace to yourself, to become autocratic. i.e., they tried to change the purpose of life and go beyond their constitution. As a result, they mutilated their own spiritual and psychophysical nature. There was a violation of all spheres of life. The spirit broke away from God and began to atrophy. The soul - was no longer dependent on the spirit, but on the body. The body, unable to sustain life on its own, became dependent on the world. But after all, the world, given by the Creator to man, is also torn off by him from the Divine energy, and turned out to be doomed to mortality. And, therefore, depending on the mortal world, man also became mortal.

“A man ate the forbidden fruit, thinking that it would give him life. But food itself outside and without God is the communion of death. It is no coincidence that what we eat must be already dead in order to become our food. We eat to live, but precisely because we eat something devoid of life, food itself leads us steadily towards death. And in death there is not and cannot be life. The thirst for immortality remained (however, often successfully lulled by the roar of civilization), but it became impossible to quench it. Any attempts to circumvent the law of death, to achieve immortality with the "autocratic hand" - through magic or technical achievements - are doomed to failure. This is the first consequence of the fall.

The second global consequence is discord in the person himself, loss of integrity. During the fall, fragmentation occurred. All God-given talents, abilities, feelings, ceased to depend on the spirit, and were out of touch with each other. Having ceased to serve their intended purpose - deification - they turned out, each in itself, an end in itself, just as cancer cells that have become detached from the body and ceased to fulfill their function, which grow at the expense of the whole organism, become an end in itself. That is, they were reborn into passions that can even compete with each other for the possession of a person, his resources.

Freedom turns into self-will, which inevitably leads to total lack of freedom (I’m not sure that this needs to be explained, it’s so obvious - just like the lack of freedom of a driver who finds himself in a ditch along with a deformed car is obvious). And also in imposing their will on others - from the family, and ending with authoritarian rule in entire states. The ability to love is reborn into egocentrism and selfishness. The natural attraction to the other sex to create a family (the Creator's commandment - "be fruitful and multiply"; "it is not good for a man to be alone") is reborn into lust and fornication. The desire for food (paradise is given to man as the Lord's meal) and the need to satiate, instead of maintaining physical and emotional strength - into the use of food as a valuable process in itself, even to the detriment of health.

The gift of creativity is used in such a way that it threatens the destruction of civilization, both in the spiritual (degeneration at the level of culture) and in the physical plane (man-made disasters). The desire for spiritual development was laid in a person - but now it leads to the fact that magic and the occult turn out to be an everyday phenomenon. The thirst for God leads to the creation of idols, false religions, cults, sects. The invested striving for happiness is replaced by the pursuit of pleasures, through which it is so easy to manipulate, and turns into dependence on drugs, gambling, etc. The possession of the world commanded by the Creator is perverted into the striving for power, wealth, and luxury. Joy from self-consciousness and from the development of one's abilities degenerates into pride and vanity...

The list goes on. This is sin - fragmentation, passion, mortality, loss of orientation, when a person is controlled by his own inclinations, which do not obey the mind and spirit, but "carry" and "carry" a person.

As for the mind and will, they have become an instrument for the realization of passionate inclinations. The mind - thinks about how to realize the attraction of the victorious passion, the will - directs the actions of a person towards its realization. It all depends on which of the passions is now stronger than the others. I no longer live, but they live by me. Each passion can "consider itself" self-sufficient - and "compete" for the possession of a person and his will with others. For example, a greedy person may want to “show off” in front of people significant to him, and will perform a charity event - vanity has won in him. A proud person can force himself to “adapt” to his superiors in order to achieve power: “I am ready to humiliate myself, if only to get a little closer to a sweet goal.”

And this suits a person - like any drug, sin gives euphoria. First of all - the euphoria of "self" ...

This is the state of man after the fall. I don’t know about anyone, but I can’t call this state normal. I am poisoned by sin, like a drug, from which the consciousness is distorted, when both the mind and the will are directed to the requirements of the sin acting in me.

That's why I need an honest "mirror" - to remind me of who I am in reality, who I was before the fall in paradise, and who I can be in the Kingdom of Christ. Remind me of that lofty goal to which I am called, and on the way to which I gain freedom and the ability to be happy.

No, not some innocent pleasures and "natural instincts" forbid the commandments of the Bible. They put a limit to self-will, and lead to that freedom that was once lost by Adam, but the return to which was granted to us by the New Adam - Our Lord and Savior and God Jesus Christ.

Number of entries: 238

1) Father, tell me what it means when a priest says before confession that if you hide, hide your sin at confession, it will get worse? How will it get worse? 2) I used to make a wish on the New Year, and when I sat between people with the same names, tell me, do I need to confess this? 3) I went to the Church for a service, I wanted to confess there, but as soon as the priest came out with a cross and the Gospel, I could not even approach him, it happened five times. Tell me, what prayers can I read so that God will help me confess?

Andrei

To aggravate means to remain unconfessed: every act that we consider sinful must be confessed, if we do not confess it, then we recognize the correctness of this act, justify it, aggravate it. Yes, in making wishes it is better to confess. In order to confess, you must first of all have a firm determination and desire not to repeat confessed sins.

hegumen Nikon (Golovko)

Hello! In childhood, up to ten years old, due to the lack of sleeping places, I had to sleep with relatives (with my sister, etc.). Several times at the same time he touched parts of the body of another person (also the one below the back) accidentally and as a joke. Then I forgot about it, did not pay attention when I confessed. Recently I decided to carefully check my past life and remembered this episode. Is this a sin, if so, how to say this in confession?

Nicholas

Hello Nikolay. Sometimes a person does not understand if he has sinned in some small thing. If this childish prank or accident bothers you, be sure to tell about it in confession. Say that in childhood you sinned by unchaste touching your sister. Help God.

Priest Sergiy Osipov

Fathers, hello! Please answer my question! Can I call in confession that I used to watch films of erotic and pornographic content as watching obscene films? And is it necessary to repent that I watched horror films and programs about psychics, read the book "The Master and Margarita"? Forgive me, thank you in advance and God bless you!

Anastasia

Hello Anastasia! Yes, you have to repent. The fuller and more detailed the confession, the deeper is the repentance.

Priest Vladimir Shlykov

Thank you very much for the answer. I confessed on the 23rd, and the priest allowed me to take communion. He (father) said that now your prayer will be purer. And it actually made me feel better. Tell me, where can I order the indestructible Psalter? I probably wrote to you that I was in four churches and in a monastery in Teryaevo, this is near Volokolamsk. I want to go there on January 6, the priest said that he would give me communion that day. And January 6 will be forty days. I want to attend the Liturgy. And yet, I ask you to pray for the newly-departed servant of God Vladimir. When I get such answers, I feel better. Thank you.

Kseniya

Xenia, I may be wrong, but it seems that in the Moscow Sretensky Monastery they read the indestructible Psalter. Also read in Diveevo. Kingdom of Heaven to the servant of God Vladimir. May the Lord forgive his soul!

hegumen Nikon (Golovko)

Hello, fathers In the book of Father Daniil Sysoev "Instructions for the Immortals" it is written that if a person dies before the arrival of a priest who would confess him, then while he is alive, he must write his sins, and relatives must hand over to the priest so that he read the permissive prayer . Is it so? After all, no sacraments are performed over the dead

Ekaterina

Formally, you are right, Ekaterina, but the Lord accepts such, albeit imperfect, repentance, Father Daniel is absolutely right in his words.

hegumen Nikon (Golovko)

5 days ago I confessed in church for the first time. The priest advised reading the 40 days Canon of repentance to our Lord Jesus Christ for the sin of abortion. Tell me, please, after reading the Canon, do I need to confess again and at this confession I need to repeat those sins that I spoke about at the first confession?

Ludmila

No, Lyudmila, you don’t need to repeat your sins at confession, but you need to go up to that priest and say that you have fulfilled his penance - so, please, do it.

hegumen Nikon (Golovko)

Hello, fathers. And if at the age of five or six I watched Kashpirovsky's television shows, to which the church has a negative attitude, as it is written in the book, I don’t remember which one, should I say this in confession? And why didn’t anything happen to me then, while many people had worsening health after that? Maybe the Lord kept me from this?

Ekaterina

Ekaterina, in fact, there is no such age, or, rather, a milestone, after which one must confess, but not earlier. If your conscience convicts in these matters, be sure to confess.

hegumen Nikon (Golovko)

Hello! Please tell me, is it possible to go to services and confession in different churches? There is a church not far from the house, and it is convenient to go to services there, but it is easier for me to confess and take communion with another priest, he is older and, as I think, more experienced, but the church is further away. Thank you for your answers to previous questions. Sincerely.

Andrei

Andrew, you can do this. If you feel such help and participation from that more experienced priest, why not resort to his advice and experience?

hegumen Nikon (Golovko)

Good afternoon! I ask you for help, parting words! Many years ago, in the strongest desperation, I asked God to save my father from prison, to save his life and asked for freedom for him in the near future. In return, she agreed to sacrifice her female happiness, to remain single. For me then it was not a huge sacrifice, since no one called for marriage and I would not have gone without love. But love was not given. I was not lucky with this, and even got used to this situation. Under loneliness meant the absence of a family (get married). My father was not released immediately, only after 3 years, he remained alive. I forgot my sacrifice to God, because my father was not released immediately, I decided that my sacrifice was not pleasing to God, just as my father’s freedom was premature. But only after 3 years I noticed that my loneliness is ABSOLUTELY. Men generally stopped noticing me, despite the fact that I was young and beautiful, and earlier, although there was no love, there were many fans. I would say they started to shy away from me. All my attempts to arrange a personal life end in a flurry of problems overnight. But the trouble is that for many years I met a man whom I fell in love with very much. Over the past years, I finally had a desire to start a family, I want a child. What do i do? I understand that I have committed a sin, and I will definitely confess and repent. I already repent. But, on the other hand, what to do next? Accept and accept your loneliness? Thank you in advance.

Julia

Hello Julia.
Everything is the will of God, and to bind yourself with an oath like yours is a mistake.
Most likely, it was not the oath that caused the disorder in your personal life. There are moments in every person's life when he considers his relationship with God as: "You are for me, I am for You." But this is the wrong approach.
God does not need our sacrifices of this kind. He is not a merchant. He can arrange any miracle, especially if there is a willingness of the one who loves and worries to sacrifice the most precious thing in order to help his neighbor. You just expressed your willingness a little wrong.
"Lord, I'm ready to sacrifice anything to help a dear person on my part. Accept my readiness, because You see right through me, show mercy to a loved one, Thy will be done!" - so we should pray; that is all he expects of us.
Therefore, surrender to the will of God. And if your family life is now arranged, thank God for this gift.
God bless you all!

Priest Sergiy Osipov

Hello, fathers! I ask for your advice. Recently, with the blessing, I take communion every week, and on this day the scolding intensifies, there is an internal struggle. I try to prepare correctly - fasting, evening service, confession, rule. Our father is young and out of ignorance I doubt his experience, so I ask you for advice on what I am doing wrong, because the condition on the day of communion is painful.

Marina

Marina, I do not presume to judge the spiritual experience of your father - I simply do not know him. But if you feel such a non-peaceful state, try to take communion less often, just don't leave it at all! Keep track of your state of mind, and if it gets better, happier, calmer, then continue.

hegumen Nikon (Golovko)

Good day! I have a question. There is a grave sin - abortion, I have already repented several times at confession, before they did not know what they were doing, now it is very difficult, the last time the priest made a remark: he said, you already confessed. Tell me, is it necessary to name the quantity, or just name the sin? Thanks in advance.

Marina

Marina, if your soul asks for it, then you can also name the number, or simply say that you repeated this sin many times. But as soon as we have repented of some sin, we should not call it again and again at confession. Although it is also not necessary to forget about it.

hegumen Nikon (Golovko)

Hello, father! A friend has recently appeared in my life, namely a friend - he helps me in my current life situation (the person closest in spirit to me died - my mom), he consoles and, in a word, invites me to visit him when he feels that I feel really bad, and we talk and talk for hours, I see that he is already falling asleep, but he still holds on and tries to keep the conversation going, goes to the cemetery with me, sometimes goes to church with me, without demanding anything in return. I always thank him for his help, he says - always contact me when something is needed. And my soul went straight to prayer for him. He said he doesn't sleep well at night and I know he drinks a lot; and somehow we started talking with him: did he begin to sleep better, I told him that I wanted to do something good for him, I remember him in prayer and light candles for him in the temple. To which he replied that, of course, he believes in God, but do not light candles for him, that he is bad and do not change his path, it is clear where it leads. Father, he responds negatively to my constant talk about the church, he invited me to Confession with him, he flatly refused. So I have a question - how should I continue to pray for him and spit on all this, as they say, because he doesn’t want to, or continue to pray and say that I continue to do this and that I believe that he has everything get better, or pray, but not tell him? Thank you.

Ludmila

Lyudmila, submit notes for your friend to the church for the Liturgy and prayers, but you don’t have to tell him about it.

hegumen Nikon (Golovko)

Hello dear fathers! Is it possible to take unction if there are no special physical illnesses, but the state of mind leaves much to be desired? Unction in our church is held in the evening, in connection with this there is another question - is it possible to take unction first, confess and take communion the next day? Or is it better to go to confession first, and then take unction? I recently started churching, so if the questions are stupid, please forgive me. Thanks for the replies!

Valeria

Valeria, in the past, unction was resorted to only when a person was so ill that, being in an unconscious state, he could no longer confess on his own. Now the view of unction has radically changed and it is considered pious and necessary to be unction at least once a year, even regardless of the physical condition of the person. In this case, it is necessary to confess just before the unction, and not after.

hegumen Nikon (Golovko)

Please tell me, I can't figure it out and find the answer. Why does the road to God become harder? I am 30. I always knew that God exists and believed. In fact, I started believing about a year ago. And the more I read both the Bible and other literature, the more and more I come to the conclusion that I will never get closer to God, I am so sinful that I am afraid to go to confession and hear that they will tell me that I will not be forgiven. I understand that the path to God is long, I go so slowly, but I try. I began to think about something else, to think a lot, I found answers to many questions. But do not understand the main thing! I am very repulsed by the fact that I understand that I am walking very slowly, I am very sinful, sometimes I understand that I cannot become completely righteous. It's very difficult in the world, but I can't leave it either. I am lost, I sometimes have no desire to pray, as if it is pointless, not because I do not believe, but because I do everything wrong, and the Lord does not hear me because of my behavior and deeds. Although there were moments that I felt his presence, but as soon as I, for example, got angry during the day or sinned in thought or deed, I lost this connection, and I think that, well, He is not a lifesaver. How long will He wait and forgive? From all these thoughts, I take a step forward, two steps back.

Anya, you don’t drive yourself into a dead end with your thoughts. The Lord is merciful and ready to forgive our every sin that we repent of. And in order not to fall into such dead ends anymore, try to go to church more often, to worship, and find yourself a confessor - he will help you figure out what is happening in your soul in time.

hegumen Nikon (Golovko)

Hello Father Nikon! I was at confession for the first time, I was preparing for it spiritually, I remembered a lot from my life, but I couldn’t pronounce everything, I handed over the sheet with my sins listed to the priest. He read carefully. He said that God will forgive if I sincerely repent. Only I had a doubt that the Lord forgave me all this, because I did not say them out loud. What is your answer, what should I do, confess them again? Thank you in advance! Sorry! May God's favor be with you!

Julia

Julia, if the priest has read everything, then nothing should be repeated. Confession done, all is well, don't worry. Now - it's up to the "small" - to live on without these sins.

hegumen Nikon (Golovko)

Hello! Please advise me on such issues. 1. This weekend I go to confession for the first time. I made a list of sins for my whole life on paper. But I'm afraid that I suddenly forgot something (and this, most likely, is the case). Can I say at the next confession what I remember later? 2. Please tell me, is cowardice a sin? If you didn’t stand up for a colleague at work, who was undeservedly yelled at by the boss, is this a sin? 3. And I am also afraid that the priest will not listen to me to the end (perhaps there will be a lot of people), then the confession will not be considered fulfilled? And what then, should we go next time and confess the same sins anew?

Natalia

Yes, Natalia, at the next confession, if something is forgotten, you can confess those sins that you remember.
Yes, the act of yours that you mentioned is a sin. It is necessary to intercede for your neighbor, especially when he suffers in vain.
The main thing is that the priest read your note with sins and read a permissive prayer over your head. In this case, confession will take place.

hegumen Nikon (Golovko)

Dear fathers, hello. In one of the answers here on the site, the priest called modern women very emotional. This is exactly how I feel about it. I really want to become a true Christian wife to my husband, not to argue, not to interfere in his affairs, to find meekness and humility. But most often this is possible only within the walls of the temple, when we, our large family with three children, come to the service. And this external impression upsets me, because internally I cannot match it. My husband is a wonderful person, sincerely loved by me, a wonderful father and family man. But in my character, obviously, in my mother, who raised me without a father, there is self-will, a desire to manage, to demand that it be my way. And I do not know how to overcome this passion, because my whole being strives for the opposite. I repent at confession, but again I show my unfeminine exactingness. The wife is upset about it too. Meanwhile, I observe a huge number of families (including Orthodox ones), where women take on the leading role and are not at all embarrassed by this. And how can I deal with these two of my entities? And another question - can I repent at confession for the sins of my mother (abortion), which I worry about with all my heart and repent for her? She does not deny God, but, according to her, she believes and prays in her soul. In a word, he does not go to church. Sorry if that's not right. Save me, God.

31.12.2015 14:19:

Hello Maria!
You have certainly committed a sin by breaking the Seventh Commandment. In the Old Testament, women were stoned for adultery. But, thank God, for His mercy to us, sinners and fallen ones. For His love, which was expressed in His Son, and our Lord Jesus Christ, Who: “was wounded for our sins and tormented for our iniquities; the punishment of our peace was upon him, and by his stripes we were healed” (Isaiah 53:5). Do not forget that the Lord loves you too, wishes you admonition, repentance, forgiveness of your sins, correction and salvation. In the Gospel we read how Christ forgave the harlot who, for her sin, they wanted to stone to death. To her He said, “Woman, I do not condemn you; go and sin no more” (John 8:11). These words can also apply to you if you sincerely repent and try not to allow such falls again. As a penance, I recommend that you read the Penitential Canon daily and make prostrations according to the number of years of life during the week before the Christmas holiday.
I also want to tell you what I usually say to all girls in such situations. The issue of personal family life is second in importance, after the issue of soul salvation. Pray that the Will of God regarding your personal life will be revealed to you: read the Psalter one kathisma a day, and on each "Glory" adding the prayer "to the girl for marriage." Also read the akathists of the Mother of God "The Unbrided Bride", Intercession, St. Nicholas the Wonderworker and Blessed. Xenia of Petersburg. In addition, it is necessary to lead a full-fledged spiritual life: visit the temple, observe fasts, pray, read the Holy Scriptures, repent of your sins, confess and take communion. I also want to remind you that many girls, in search of their "chosen one", enter into premarital intimate relationships, which deprive themselves of God's help, His blessing and grace-filled support, due to prodigal sin. Therefore, one of the conditions for arranging a happy personal life and creating a prosperous family is a chaste pious life before marriage.

Guest 01/03/2016 19:52:

Eh, Maria... Batiushka is right, of course. To stay in the world without falling into adulterous sins is possible only by grace, we ourselves will NEVER be able to do this, this is above natural for a person who has especially tasted this sin. Virgins are falling, where are we going... Mary, the demon of fornication torments a person until old age, and doesn't even leave married people. Remember this. Fall, repent, and never despair, God will always forgive you, but run away from sin! Try to distract yourself from thoughts about men, you need to improve your spiritual life, just don’t judge anyone and don’t overeat and it will be easier, you yourself went through all this. Prepare your soul, cleanse your heart so that it can love, so that you can marry in purity, get married and all your sins will be forgiven. But in marriage, be faithful, there is already a big demand. The sin of this love in the heart kills, it becomes hardened, it becomes insensitive, and there are many divorces - they are not faithful to each other, often they are simply not true in their thoughts, virtually, via the Internet, but even this is already a sin! As soon as your heart is ready, the betrothed will appear, God will send. Pray for a spiritual father and God will send him, He hears all of us and fulfills all petitions, as He loves us - NEVER DESPAIR!!! Help you Lord!